Post your Dom3 Haiku

[sansanjuan]

Inspired (?) by Omni and our Acouchi AAR thread

==== Haiku #1

Site searching
Barbarians uprise
Mage butter

==== Haiku #2

The battle joins
Two hundred crossbows !!?
[censored]



...your turn
-SSJ

[Gregstrom]

Storming their frontier
What's a Fountain doing here?
Deicide is good

[sector24]

Summon Earthpower
King of Elemental Earth
Blade Wind those bastards

[Zenzei]

Curse of Blood cast
Lords are having a dinner
You're invited

PS: this thread is great http://forum.shrapnelgames.com/images/smilies/happy.gif

[Saulot]

The orchid blossom
Trampled underfoot by my
Raging troglodytes*
====
Forge me the jade knife
Delicate as your heart shows
Your fragility
====
Gathering the gems
Poring over countless tomes
Arcane Nexus, Mine!


I concur, Zenzei http://forum.shrapnelgames.com/images/smilies/happy.gif

*replace with elephants, minotaurs, juggernaut, behemoths, otherness, chariots, shambler thrall, war lobsters, etc. as per personal preference.

[Digress]

The witch kings visit
They came they saw they nibbled
Tasted like chicken

[sansanjuan]

Earth Mother
Large in your Icon
No strategic figs

===========

Wrong Province
Wrong Formation
No survivors

===========

My beautiful gems
Wasted on small monkeys
Enjoy the dungeon

[vfb]

Digress said:
The witch kings visit
They came they saw they nibbled
Tasted like chicken



http://forum.shrapnelgames.com/images/smilies/biggrin.gif I liked that one!

[Omnirizon]

nice SSJ.

SSJ is the genius to discover it all, but I must post my own inadvertent haiku that started it all; from our game thread in the MP forum.


so slow
disillusionment setting in
turns... where are the turns?

[Foodstamp]

Have new volunteers
Is it wicked not to care
Bottomless Ocean

[vfb]

Foodstamp said:
Have new volunteers
Is it wicked not to care
Bottomless Ocean



Oooh, I like that one too! In the same theme:

Militia arrives
Far away from my borders
Barbarians, please!

[Omnirizon]

beneath my great sledge
an insignificant fly
Hoping it moves first

[Agrajag]

Huge army attacks
Why the hell did I lose there
Damn sneaking command

[Foodstamp]

Agrajag said:
Huge army attacks
Why the hell did I lose there
Damn sneaking command



I LOLd

[Mr_Dark]

Pale riders pillage
Call the Eater of the Dead
Ermor's banners rise...

[VedalkenBear]

sinuyama ka
nihon zya nai yo
hontoo sa

[RedWurm]

dragon kicked to death
by rearmost missile units
it's good to be ulm

-always good for a laugh in SP games http://forum.shrapnelgames.com/images/smilies/happy.gif

eighty arbalests
troops surround lone enemy
they fire at nearest...

[Jazzepi]

Little monkey PD
Why can't I win a game?
Oh right, I suck

Jazzepi

[Edi]

Flyers attack rear
Move to mop up footmen
A hundred crossbow salvo...

[Kamamura]

I would like to remind (especially the founder of the thread), that to qualify as a haiku, you must at least conform to the 5/7/5 syllable structure.

Mad god from the depths
dreamers answer his calling
Svatopluk's his name

(That actually happened, here in Czech Svatopluk is a quite common, homely name, to have a giant Lovecraftian behemoth with tentacles and three legs called Svatopluk seemed extremely funny to all who saw my game in progress).

[lch]

Kamamura said:
I would like to remind (especially the founder of the thread), that to qualify as a haiku, you must at least conform to the 5/7/5 syllable structure.


Only if you're following Kyoshi's "traditional" movement. The syllables are formed differently than in Japanese, anyway, so even adhering to the 5-7-5 structure doesn't guarantee a good rythm. If you keep it short, that should be sufficient.

[Saxon]

The fearsome SC
The pride of high protection
The AN death bless

Hmm, the abbreviations do not help the poetry, will work on this more. The syllable's work, but the letters instead of words take away the grace of the poem.

[VedalkenBear]

I think a _much_ better exercise would be to do a renga, but I'm not sure if anyone else even knows what that is.

The Japanese restriction should be adhered to as much as possible, IMO. But then, if you do, you come out with something _extremely_ short (cf. my haiku).

[lch]

VedalkenBear said:
I think a _much_ better exercise would be to do a renga, but I'm not sure if anyone else even knows what that is.


You need two people for that, first of all.

[vfb]

It's a little like this, isn't it? Except, not funny.

http://fromearth.net/LetsPlay/Boatmurdered/

[Saxon]

Waiting for the turn,
the unknowns of combat weigh
on my nervous heart.

[Jazzepi]

This is for fun
Worry about restrictions
All fun is lost

Jazzepi

[VedalkenBear]

Ich: I believe the traditional number for doing a renga was 3. At least, all of the renga that I had to read were done by three different poets. Considering the format we have here, we have at least... what, 10 different people? It seems quite doable.

Jazzepi: Restrictions are what makes poetry poetry.

[Morkilus]

Mad art without form
Chaotic dreams from R'lyeh
May still be pretty

[VedalkenBear]

Ermor's legions rise
from the same bed as flowers;
life and death the same?

[cleveland]

Late Winter armies
Relentlessly conquering
Productivity

[quantum_mechani]

The Vampire queen
Oh, her tragic fate
Pick a cyclops

[HotNifeThruButr]

Pythian Theurgs
Use Arcane Communion
Justice League, ASSEMBLE!

Abysian might
Legions of Warbred giants
No need for pension

Skratti Blood magic
Unleash the cursed Illwinter
Where are Rimtursar? >:(

Tiny lil' Hoburg
Dominate your armored men
Painful bolt volley

[hnchrist3]

I am THE Ermor.
Death is just a door away.
Surrender. Now. Here.

[Omnirizon]

endless slaughter
intrigue and treachery
is fun for pixels

[AmbsAce]

Pain, Attrition, Strife,
Precedes riotous laughter.
Elephant neighbors.

The heart of winter,
Did I pay that heating bill?
Dead Golem Crafters.

And my favorite internet-born haiku....

Haikus are easy,
But sometimes they don't make sense.
Refrigerator.

[QXel]

From last evening :

A Hundred fierce Abysians
A Death seven mage
Shadow blasted to death ...

ARRRGHH !!! I curse Caelum !!! (well, if I manage to survive ...)

[Saxon]

Sansanjaun,

When you are done the AAR for the game, can you let us know where it is posted? I would love to read it. Playing in the game makes for much more interesting reading!

Why does this haiku
Sound exactly like a long
And boring sentence?

[K]

Casting killer Wish
Taking your awesome Auglermeir
Your army loses.


-----------
I think I misspelled the luck sword name.

[Firewalker]

Welcome Arch Devil
Serving roasted markata
Bandar PD sucks.

[sansanjuan]

A few more...

Looks like rain
Cloud Trapeze
Combatant downpour

=====

Early trash talk
Armies Instantiate
Crow served warm

=====

Opposing Armies
Adjacent provinces
.2H Collision


-SSJ

[hnchrist3]

Just one single-click
All before me fall in death
Just another turn

[Digress]

A triple bless build
Pray not a close neighbour be
MA Mictlan huh ?

[Randvek]

A handful of gems?!
Wait, just one lousy Earth Gem?
I must have small hands.

True story.

[HoneyBadger]

Niefel Warrior,
Axe cuts through flesh like butter!
PD? it's TP.

Niefel Jarl Prophet,
Arena, against Men? Gods?
Beauty and Despair.

Prophet Champion,
Masses struck down by trident,
Blood and Victory!

Niefel Pretender...
Wyrm? Skratti? Son of Fenrir?
Imprisoned Cyclops!

Triple Bless 10,
Cuts all Nations down like wheat!
Except Late Ermor...

[moderation]

Frustrated wizard,
Pours over grimore at night,
The perfect spell appears.

[Omnirizon]

wow i like that one, moderation.

almost a perfect haiku too, 5-7-5ish; and the syllabuls don't matter much, given the loose relevance of them in translation from japanese to english formats. the important thing is beat, which that one captures fine.

and the substance, so wonderful. i can totally relate. i guess... if i imagine myself a wizard (graduate student) pouring over a grimour, late at night, (stacks of books and countless PDF's of articles), looking for the perfect spell (theory, or argument, or way to frame a concept). and it just suddenly _appears_ (that moment of clarity, or is it a delusion? who cares, it feels like a spell appearing).

personal meaning or not, its a good haiku capturing a classic image.

[moderation]

Thanks Omnirizon. This one happened happened by accident as much as anything. The fact that it was rather late and I was being bad by staying up hunting for strategy tips probably had something to do with it. The original version was a bit different, but I tweaked and poked at it till it sounded better.

By the way, I liked your haiku "endless slaughter/intrigue and treachery/
is fun for pixels" for it's amused detachment. The other humorous ones that people have posted are also very entertaining. Well I'll get back to grimore now. Here's to mage butter and elephant neighbors! http://forum.shrapnelgames.com/images/smilies/laugh.gif

[sansanjuan]

R,
Or a big gem! http://forum.shrapnelgames.com/images/smilies/laugh.gif
-SSJ

[moderation]

Here's my response to Haiku #1. http://forum.shrapnelgames.com/images/smilies/happy.gif

Have all searchers flee
And fear not your wizards slain
Ah, the joy of micro.

[cleveland]

sansanjuan said:
R,
Or a big gem! http://forum.shrapnelgames.com/images/smilies/laugh.gif
-SSJ



Conceptually,
what size are these magic gems?
Bread basket?...Bigger?

[Omnirizon]

a bread basket size magic gem would be pretty gaudy.

but then water gems are apparently "ice crystals of fantastic proportions"; so who knows.

[moderation]

I wonder how Abysia keeps it's water gems from melting...

[Darkstone]

The key word in magic gems is magic. http://forum.shrapnelgames.com/images/smilies/happy.gif

[Kristoffer O]

Water gems might be:

Unmelting ice, a blob of quicksilver, a conch shell with the sound of the sea, an aquamarine of epical proportions, a captured ripple, a weeping stone.

The term gems is used for conveniance sake. Could have called it quintessence or something, but gems is pretty straighforward.

[Agrajag]

an aquamarine of epical proportions


I doubt their proportions are that epic, considering you can carry around thirty of them without encumbering you (and presumably in a nifty little pouch)

[sansanjuan]

Mod,
Well said!

On another note...
If "dilithium crystals" were good enough for Star Trek then "gems" are good enough for Dom 1,2,3,4(?).
-SSJ

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Dilithium_(Star_Trek)

[sansanjuan]

;)

Tribbles of R’lyeh

Polypal Spawn
Sharpie and cardboard
“For food or Pets!”


Too many chefs

Kingmaker cauldron
Simmering on one thousand candles
If you can’t stand the heat….


-SSJ

[Taqwus]

"Spring Fever"
--------------

Stupid traitor mage:
"Touch of Madness" your own God?
For this, you shall burn!

[chrispedersen]

Bugs Abound
Turns Unknowable. Game or
waterboard?

[JimMorrison]

Temporarily removed for review ~Edi


Locus of the stars
Shine their light down upon me
Chosen son of light


It's your birthday
100 fine Astral Pearls
Blow out the candles

[Ironhawk]

pride embodied
high king of the SCs
welcome to hell

[Edi]

[snip]


Locus of the stars
Shine their light down upon me
Chosen son of light


It's your birthday
100 fine Astral Pearls
Blow out the candles
That first one gives a REALLY, REALLY bad vibe, Jim. I know Dominions 3 has a blood sacrifice component to it, but holy crap, no, this is not good. I know you didn't mean it that way, but that's the way ot looks like. Even in context, that would probably be enough to get you outright banned in a few forums I frequent and they generally don't ban users lightly. Sorry, but it's going to disappear from view for a moment until it has been reviewed by someone with more authority than I have.

[JimMorrison]

:(

It just..... O.O

I just wanted something about blood magic, and it came out with such shocking clarity..... I apologize for using my poetic powers for evil..... :doh:

[HoneyBadger]

In Jim's defense, I read the poem and yes, it was very, very dark, but he was also just working with what was already in the game. When you're dealing with the subject matter that happens to be 13 year old blind virgin girls destined to be sacrificed to dark gods, how many directions do you have to go?

It's not like he posted a pedophiliac snuff film. It's just a poem, and it concerned things that are already a reality that we deal with every day: namely Blood Slaves.

And when there's something with that potential to be profoundly disturbing in a shared environment, such as a community forum, it's bound to force it's way out into the open, eventually. Trying to pretend that Blood Slaves represent anything other than what they clearly and descriptively *do* represent is just sticking our heads in the sand, and sweeping a problematic issue under the rug, just because we're not capable of dealing with it.

This is explicitely a thread for art, and while art may be difficult to interpret, especially when it's dark and shocking and negative, it's still the perogative of the one who's experiencing the art to interpret it.

Yes, people should expect to have a choice about what they're exposed to-this being a games forum-because the community and the companies involved have a certain amount of responsibility to advise others about the content they can expect, but doesn't mean that that's they way the real world works.

I don't think Jim meant any harm, either. I also don't think he *did* any harm. Yes, the words he used were very evocative-that's to his credit as a writer-and yes, what he evoked was dark and terrible and hard to imagine-or perhaps the problem is that it was too easily imagined? But you'll notice that he didn't use any of the censored words the forum blots out, and-no matter how good a writer he may be-he didn't force us to think evil thoughts-he just opened the door to them.

Censorship doesn't solve any problems, it just hides problems in dark corners, where they can grow bigger and worse, unnoticed.

[Edi]

If you have a problem with moderation decisions, you are supposed to take them to an administrator over PM. However, since this is here already, I will respond to it so that the reasoning behind the decision is there for everyone to see.

In Jim's defense, I read the poem and yes, it was very, very dark, but he was also just working with what was already in the game. When you're dealing with the subject matter that happens to be 13 year old blind virgin girls destined to be sacrificed to dark gods, how many directions do you have to go?

It's not like he posted a pedophiliac snuff film. It's just a poem, and it concerned things that are already a reality that we deal with every day: namely Blood Slaves.
There's one general direction but a few different paths. Yes, there is blood sacrifice and blood slaves in the game and I have never forgotten just what it would mean in absolute terms. But there are differences between ways of dealing with that in creative work. The Dominions 3 thematic texts have never made any pretense of sugarcoating it or downplaying what it means, but neither have they sung the praises of blood sacrifice.

The main problem with Jim's poem stems from the last line in combination with the first two. The first two are just fine and if the third one had been something else, such as "The Demon Gate opens", there'd have been no problem whatsoever with it. But with the line that was there, the whole context of the poem changed to something far worse.

And when there's something with that potential to be profoundly disturbing in a shared environment, such as a community forum, it's bound to force it's way out into the open, eventually. Trying to pretend that Blood Slaves represent anything other than what they clearly and descriptively *do* represent is just sticking our heads in the sand, and sweeping a problematic issue under the rug, just because we're not capable of dealing with it.
I have never pretended that blood sacrifice in Dominions is anything other than what it is and if you think I have, you can post quotes right now or shut up.

There is no way that piece is going to come back in its original form because to everyone who does not play Dominions it gives exactly the impression which led to its removal. Hell, for many of those who do play Dominions it gives the same impression nontheless, though we can recognize that it was not intended. Leaving it up on the forum gives or might give the wider outside world the impression that Shrapnel Games condones or approves that sort of thing. If anyone should link it and post it somewhere else, that's a PR disaster waiting to happen. Because of that, it has been preemptively dealt with.

Most of us are quite capable of dealing with a lot of dark and negative things, both in real life and in art, but that is quite irrelevant to the point I made above. Besides that, this forum has (or at least has had) users as young as 13 and therefore some judgment must be exercised even when posting art.

This is explicitely a thread for art, and while art may be difficult to interpret, especially when it's dark and shocking and negative, it's still the perogative of the one who's experiencing the art to interpret it.
This happens to be a private forum where it is the prerogative of the owner, Shrapnel Games, to determine what is and is not appropriate to post on their forums. I made the determination that Jim's poem should be reviewed and that pending review it would not be visible. I brought it up with the other mods and admins and so far I have heard no disagreement.

Yes, people should expect to have a choice about what they're exposed to-this being a games forum-because the community and the companies involved have a certain amount of responsibility to advise others about the content they can expect, but doesn't mean that that's they way the real world works.
What's your point here? It's precisely the way the real world works that when companies take their responsibilities as well as their posted policies seriously, the potential problems of this nature are tackled promptly instead of waiting and hoping nothing negative happens. In the real world we may not always have a choice of not seeing things such as traffic accidents that leave human body parts strewn all over the road, but how is that relevant to the operation of this forum?

I don't think Jim meant any harm, either. I also don't think he *did* any harm. Yes, the words he used were very evocative-that's to his credit as a writer-and yes, what he evoked was dark and terrible and hard to imagine-or perhaps the problem is that it was too easily imagined? But you'll notice that he didn't use any of the censored words the forum blots out, and-no matter how good a writer he may be-he didn't force us to think evil thoughts-he just opened the door to them.
As I said, I do not think he did it on purpose and I don't think he meant any harm. It's quite easy when writing poetry to sometimes consider things line by line and then miss something that comes from a combination of lines that by themselves have nothing wrong in them. I think this is exactly what happened. Compare to what it would have been, had the last line been according to my example above. As far as opening doorways to evil, I've seen enough evil and read enough about evil seen by others that it's not like I'm acting like a corrupted innocent here. In this case, I consider it best that the piece in its original form not appear here because of the associations and doubts it may evoke.

Censorship doesn't solve any problems, it just hides problems in dark corners, where they can grow bigger and worse, unnoticed.
What is being addressed with removing Jim's poem and what you think is being addressed with it seem from my perspective to be two entirely different things. If you have any complaints after reading this post, take them via PM to an administrator. Mindi and Annette are fairly active on the forum and they should answer your concerns promptly.

[Annette]

I don't think Jim meant any harm, either. I also don't think he *did* any harm. Yes, the words he used were very evocative-that's to his credit as a writer-and yes, what he evoked was dark and terrible and hard to imagine-or perhaps the problem is that it was too easily imagined? But you'll notice that he didn't use any of the censored words the forum blots out, and-no matter how good a writer he may be-he didn't force us to think evil thoughts-he just opened the door to them.

Censorship doesn't solve any problems, it just hides problems in dark corners, where they can grow bigger and worse, unnoticed.

Edi took the appropriate action by moving the content in question to our private forum for administrative review. Our forum administrators, myself included, have chosen to leave the content permanently removed from public view. When taken out of context, the sentiment expressed is obscene and suggestive of illegal activity. I'm pretty sure Jim understands and accepts our moderation. Please refer to our Forum Rules "1) Moral Conduct" and "14)Do Not Argue With The Above Forum Rules" if you have any questions about our moderation policies and how proceed if you disagree.

This particular subject is closed for public discussion.

[JimMorrison]

To be honest, I think it says a lot about human insecurities, I've written volumes about the evils of Political Correctness.

Be that as it may, I do understand what it means to be a guest. Likely, some of you think of it like the vomit that was found in the public restroom, "ARGH, thanks for grabbing the mop so fast, Edi!", but allowing that sort of reaction isn't entirely fair to yourselves.

Was there an unintentional double entendre in that last line? Absolutely not. The double entendre was absolutely intentional. The beauty in poetry, most of all such highly defined forms as haiku, is to fit as much meaning into as little space as possible. Did that poem let you too deeply into the mind of the blood mage? Perhaps for some people's comfort level, it did. I didn't write it to be comfortable, I wrote it to be evocative.

But you are correct, I do know what it means to be a good guest, and I'm not arguing the point - you did what you felt was right, and life goes on. It's not an R rated forum, and I should have (and will in the future) considered that many would see that poem as containing "mature themes". :p


(Edit- this deserved a more PG-13 blood haiku!)

Clever little mage
Bathe in hot virgin blood
Making Angels cry


<3

[HoneyBadger]

I'm an American. I know we have a lot of people here from other countries, and I'm certain that you have your own noble heritages that stem from a patriotic view of those countries, and the symbology that each country stands for, and represents.

As an American, I have the right to freedom of speech, but I also have the responsibility to defend it. Freedom of speech has been under attack by not only special interests, but a more general public, for probably half my lifetime. Even our current President has attacked it, publically, on more than one occasion. He's already rewritten the Constitution, so it's no idle threat.

Right now I have a wife I love, a home I love living in, a job that satisfies me, friends, family, health, and stuff. In other words, a life I don't mind living. A life I enjoy, that holds hope and promise for a better future. I've never served in the Military-I'm not physically fit nor philosophically inclined to do so. My family has a proud military tradition, though, and we've given a member to every single just American war, since the Revolution-and if we should ever have another just American war, I'd be proud to serve in it. I'm proud of our soldiers who do serve, and I tell them whenever I meet one-which is fairly often in my line of work. If this country were ever attacked, I would defend it to the utmost, and I would absolutely defend my personal interests-my wife, my home, my family, etc, to the utmost-but that's as far as it goes. I like my peaceful life, and I don't enjoy conflict or confrontation outside of Dominions 3 or a sparring ring for boxing, martial arts, fencing, what have you.

I *would* defend freedom of speech with my life. I would give my life, and give up everything that I love, cherish, or own, in order to preserve that. To me, freedom of speech is *being* an American. That's what it means, that's our tradition, that's what I stand for, with every cell in my body and thought in my head, with 300 years of my family's history to add it weight.

I understand that Shrapnel Games isn't particularly concerned with the freedom of speech question, that it's a business with image concerns-in that, it's just like any other business-and that I and anyone else is perfectly free to go say whatever we want someplace else if we don't like it. I get that, and I have no plans of leaving, so I *will* follow the rules to the best of my ability.

But don't look for, and don't expect, that I'll quit defending freedom of speech. It might not apply on these forums in a physical way, but I'd say the same things to a citizen of any other country where freedom of speech doesn't apply. I'll follow the rules and laws while I'm on these forums, just like I would if I were a guest in another country, but that doesn't alter who I am, and it doesn't change freedom of speech from being a beautiful ideal that I'm proud to fall under, nor my willingness to uphold it with every fibre of my being.

I am not condemning you, Edi, or for your actions. I understand them, and the necessity behind them. I want you to know that. If I were in your place, as a representative of a company, I might do the same thing.
I'm defending Jim, and the things I personally believe in and hold sacred- not attacking you, or Shrapnel Games.

[Tifone]

I understand we're all guests here, so the host makes the rules, that's ok, but I think, damn, we're all adults and vaccinated, we all know some things exist, I don't think if Jim has some artistic words about some controversial aspect of the game he will create a psycopathic monster out of a normal reader of the forum, or he is defending some crime. Damn, Kubrik was to be shot dead for what he expressed through his work or not? ^_^
OK, jokes aside, I know u guys have the upper hand here, I just wanted to "break a spear" in favour of one of our artists here.

BTW, have u seen the http://www.everypoet.com/haiku/default.htm website? it automatically creates some haikus which really seem coming from dom3 sometimes ^_^ an example

catapults frown, first
mottled sharp earth awaits, ghoul
runs brightly, faceless

sorcerers extrude
agonies reconsider
silently, snidely

PeAcE ^_^

[JimMorrison]

One simple haiku
I am a trouble maker
Blood stirs in your heart


Nightmares of the past
Dead coming to take my soul
Vengeance will be theirs


Can't handle the truth
Your lies bring life to the dead
Call me Prince of Death


In a world of my own
Yes, I'm the great pretender
I dream all alone

[lch]

Sounds like something from http://www.prestopnik.com/emo_haiku/

[Nikelaos]

Raining down come stones
Mages fall in deep graves
Blood spilled for god

Nine bites of poison
Nine fresh dug open graves
Nine soon to be slain

[llamabeast]

This post is spectacularly off-topic. However, I just wrote pretty much my first ever poem, and I'm quite pleased with it, so I thought I'd stick it here.

My friend Laila just got back from our trip to Edinburgh (we were in an improvised comedy show together), to find that all of her stuff, which was stored in the university cellars, was buried under other people's boxes. So I thought I'd write a poem about it, and it ended up much longer than expected! I had Dr Seuss in mind when I was writing it, so the style is, I guess, meant to be reminiscent of his.

--

The trousers and towels and sweaters and sockses
Of young Laila Tims were buried in boxes
"Oh fee!", she cried, "Oh fee and oh fie!
"Oh why are these boxes piled so high?"

But Laila was smart, as soon we shall see,
She said "This shall not get the better of me!"
So she thought and she thunk, and she mulled and she pondered;
She walked as she thought and she thunk as she wandered
And suddenly Laila came up with a plan:
"I need only go to the animal man!"

So to Alex's Shop of Wonderful Creatures
Stocking myriad beasts, with countless strange features
Laila Tims travelled, by foot and by bike
(for to walk the whole way would have been quite a hike).
And when she returned she bore creatures of merit:
In each of her hands she carried a ferret.

Now the ferrets were smart and the ferrets were quick
The ferrets could dance and their movements were slick
The ferrets knew German and Russian and Basque
If you wanted translations you just had to ask;
The ferrets knew Welsh and they knew Ancient Greek
(Though in place of the etas the ferrets would squeak).

Leila talked to the ferrets, and she asked them with care
"Could you rescue my things from that pile over there?
"My skirts look like this and my blouses like that
"My trousers are few but they're next to my hat
"My travelling clothes are whiter than white
"But if you make pawprints they'll still be alright."

So the ferrets went in and the ferrets came out
Those ferrets of Laila's did not hang about!
They brought out her t-shirts, her books and her booze
They brought our her trousers and blouses and shoes
And finally, piled up there on the floor
Were all Leila's things, collected by paw.

But one problem remained to mar this success:
The pile was still in a terrible mess!
And so the ferrets returned to their task
She did not even need to ask
Her skirts in a wardrobe, her socks in a drawer
They hung up her hat on a hook by the door.

Then at length and at last, when all was done,
They decided it was time for fun.
So Laila sang and the ferrets danced,
Laila poured gin, and the ferrets pranced.
The ferrets had never had gin before
They loved it so much that they drank more and more!
And friend let me say, should you feel down or iffy,
The world's finest thing is a ferret that's squiffy.

Still, when the dawn came, they grew tired in the head
And they all went upstairs to her ferret-made bed.
There Leila slept, in her room fresh and neat
And the ferrets curled up, and slept by her feet.

[Ballbarian]

I don't even pretend to care about haiku,
but to llama I must say-
that poem was cool :cool:

[sansanjuan]

Lbeast,
Now you just need to work on the illustrations... :)
-SSJ

[JimMorrison]

That was awesome Llama! Any poem with ferrets, and a girl named Laila is a recipe for success, I reckon. :p

BTW, is she single? ;)

[Edi]

Great poem, llamabeast! :D

[llamabeast]

:) Thanks guys!

[HoneyBadger]

Now do one about badgers!

[Kamamura]

Many clumsy words
bashed crudely into verses
gulag for badgers

[HoneyBadger]

Satisfactory! thanks :)

[JaghataiKhan]

I had many Ba'als
And put them into magical halls
but they even ate the rune-adorned walls

*****

Tried to make a Turkish faction
Didn't have the original copy
Cast wish for "digital download"

*****

Sort of Jomonese poetry
Becomes addictive and is easy
Even for non-English speakers it is so easy

[Tifone]

JaghataiKhan,

yours were funny and nice but remember, Haikus are 5-7-5 syllabes ;) For other kinds of poetry (and free poetry as well) I suggest you this other thread. Best wishes ^^

[JaghataiKhan]

Didn't know. I'll try a correct one.

[Doo]

Dominion score ten
Pretender an immortal
This thread lives again!

[13lackGu4rd]

as someone who is actually familiar with the Japanese culture in general and in Haikus specifically I must say I'm deeply saddened by this thread. there is a huge misconception here it seems of what Haikus really are. Haikus are not just about the 5-7-5 structure, they're about minimalistic language, minimalistic esthetics(beauty) Wabi-Sabi in Japanese, and much more, but I don't want to confuse you guys too much...

also, even if you just go by the structure, without the "soul" of Haikus, than at least add the season element(not the actual season name but a clear yet minimalistic reference to a season), which is as crucial to the Haiku structure as the 5-7-5 format.

[Doo]

*sigh*

Head turns, solar flare
Dry air stirs, passionate heat
Seduce Rakshasi

[Gregstrom]

This ain't a haiku
According to Blackguard-san
Unless I say "Spring"

[13lackGu4rd]

This ain't a haiku
According to Blackguard-san
Unless I say "Spring"

wrong. better luck trying to troll me next time.
hint: read the actual post before trying to troll.

[Doo]

Youth lost, cycle ends
Cold heart, white hair, shrill cackle
Old Crone has life yet.

Your turn 13lackGu4rd....

[Corporal Clegg]

Duels from dawn to dusk
Luck and strategy prevails
Red wet blades of steel

[Doo]

Acashic Record
Lost from view, return anew
Dormant buds yield fruit

[Stagger Lee]

Punishment too harsh
Community divided
Ice grows in our hearts

[Corporal Clegg]

Demon breeds arise!
Spring of cosmic powers flow!
Claim domain again!

[Gandalf Parker]

JaghataiKhan,

yours were funny and nice but remember, Haikus are 5-7-5 syllabes ;) For other kinds of poetry (and free poetry as well) I suggest you this other thread. Best wishes ^^

But if you are more light hearted than you are serious...
Limericks have their own thread
http://forum.shrapnelgames.com/showthread.php?t=40374
and also a type of poetry I guess, Parody songs have a thread
http://forum.shrapnelgames.com/showthread.php?t=41946

[Swan]

life is an art
be it on water or earth
keep this in the heart