n00bs of DOOOOOOOOOM!!!! - Five Nations Surviving

[jimbojones1971]

This is an MP game for n00bs (such as myself). For the purposes of this game, a n00b is someone with about five MP games or less, but if you are close to that and want to quibble let me know on the thread and we can chat - the idea is a level playing field rather than to be pointlessly pedantic :)

The idea is to set up a smallish game (~15 provinces per player) with a moderate number of players, and go for it. And please, no dick moves or stupid exploits.

The game details are as follows. (Where someone else had already described a particular point well, e.g. Calahan and exploits, I’ve reused their text – many thanks to the originators!)

Age: Middle Age.

Map: "Ilzgot" map (104 land, 16 sea provinces): http://dom3.servegame.com/wiki/Ilzgot

Turn Length: Turns start at 24 hours and will be extended liberally as needed.

Number of player: 7 (max of two water nations)

Non-standard settings: Score graphs disabled, 15 Hall-of-Fame, re-naming allowed.

Mods being used: No mods, this is a vanilla game.

Hosting: Hosting will be done via llamaserver. Once we have enough people, I'll create the game.

The game can be found here on llamaserver: http://www.llamaserver.net/gameinfo.cgi?game=n00bsOfDoom

Selecting Nations: If everyone can post three nations they’d like to play (in order of preference) I’ll randomise the selections and we’ll see who gets what.

Diplomacy and Trades: The inviolability or otherwise of NAPs is up to individual players. At the end of the day, this is a win at all costs game, so it is perhaps not surprising that sometimes backstabs occur.
The exception to this is that trade agreements such as a gem / item swap / purchase / province trades, are a totally different type of agreement to NAP's. You are expected to honour any and all trade agreements that you make. Please don’t be a douche bag.

Banned Exploits:
1. Copying the script orders from Bogus and his friends to others commanders (ie. The 'Fire Commanders' orders).
2. Overloading other players labs by sending them lots of items they did not request. Be they worthless or valuable.
3. Being a general douche bag is not allowed in this game.

If you need to leave in mid-game for whatever reason, please give us time to find a replacement.

Players and Preferences:
As people sign up, and give me my preferences, I will log them here.
Everyone got their first preferences (bolded below).

JimboJones1971
Marignon
Pythium
Arcoscephale

Tzarin:
Shinuyama
Marignon
Man

CthuluDreams:
Oceania
Ryleh
Vanhiem

GFSnl:
Caelum
Pythium
Abyssia

SirMu
Jotunheim (Gone to Tartarus)
Ulm
Eriu

Decrepus
Bandar Log (Gone to Tartarus)
C'tis
Pangea

kennoseishin
T'ien Ch'i
Vanheim
Ashdod

[CthulhuDreams]

Two water nations in 16 provinces is going to be cramped. Either way, I'm keen.

[jimbojones1971]

Sweeeet. Preferences?

[GFSnl]

Hi, first time MP.
I would love to play Caelum.
2nd and 3rd option are Pythium and Abyssia

[jimbojones1971]

Hi, first time MP.
I would love to play Caelum.
2nd and 3rd option are Pythium and Abyssia

Excellent! Welcome, and I look forward to playing with you :-)

That gives us four players, only three more to go.

[SirMu]

Hey there, first time posting - and playing online- and I was waiting for a noob game to pop up.

My orders:
1) Ulm
2) Jotunheim
3) Eriu

[jimbojones1971]

Hey there, first time posting - and playing online- and I was waiting for a noob game to pop up.

My orders:
1) Ulm
2) Jotunheim
3) Eriu

Glad you decide to join us, welcome SirMu :-)

[Decrepus]

Also my first post. :)

I would like to try Bandar Log.

[jimbojones1971]

Also my first post. :)

I would like to try Bandar Log.

Bandar Log always looked like a lot of fun to me, so good choice I think.

Do you have second and third preferences, just in case?

[Decrepus]

C'tis and Pangea both seem to have interesting mechanics so either of those too.

[kennoseishin]

I'll join in too, so that makes seven. I hope I won't get banished to a watery grave like in my first game (damn mammoths!).

My first pick is R'lyeh, tentatively.

[kennoseishin]

<del>My first pick is R'lyeh, tentatively.</del>

On second thought, I'll go with:
1)T'ien Ch'i
2)Vanheim
3)Ashdod

Also, I'm surprised there's no way to edit posts.

[Decrepus]

<del>My first pick is R'lyeh, tentatively.</del>

On second thought, I'll go with:
1)T'ien Ch'i
2)Vanheim
3)Ashdod

Also, I'm surprised there's no way to edit posts.

There is, I edited my first post. I guess it is "for a limited time only" :D

[CthulhuDreams]

Yes, there is only a limited window of post editing.

I am going

Oceania, Ryleh, Vanhiem - but I don't think the map is big enough for two water nations (I'm still trying to recover from a similar horror situation in Rock the Cradle), so if someone else is going with water can I have Vanhiem.

If there is no other water power Oceania is excruciatingly bad, so it will probably all work out.

Regards,

Cthulhu

[jimbojones1971]

So we've got seven. I'll just give the last guy a while to finalise his race, but at this stage I think we'll all get our first preferences.

I'll set up the game on llamaserver later today and then let everyone know that they can submit their pretenders.

(If you could please leave a post in this thread when you've submitted your pretender (so that I know its yours and not someone jumping the queue) that would be great :) )

[SirMu]

Hey, can I change my race preference to Jotunheim first, followed by Ulm? I've been testing out MA Ulm in Single player and I don't like it very much.

[jimbojones1971]

Hey, can I change my race preference to Jotunheim first, followed by Ulm? I've been testing out MA Ulm in Single player and I don't like it very much.
Done :-)

[jimbojones1971]

CthuluDreams has suggested a couple of changes to our rules of engagement:
* change site frequency to 50
* turn on score graphs
* remove the bit about requiring province swaps to be honoured from the "diplomacy and trades" section (so economic trades still must be honoured, but not territory swaps)

Does anyone have any issues with these changes?

[tzarin]

1. Shinuyama
2. Marignon
3. Man


Im Tzvim apparently lol

[jimbojones1971]

1. Shinuyama
2. Marignon
3. Man


Im Tzvim apparently lol

Thanks dude :-)

Yeah, forgot your username so I just punched the keyboard and went with whatever came up ;-)

[CthulhuDreams]

CthuluDreams has suggested a couple of changes to our rules of engagement:
* change site frequency to 50
* turn on score graphs
* remove the bit about requiring province swaps to be honoured from the "diplomacy and trades" section (so economic trades still must be honoured, but not territory swaps)

Does anyone have any issues with these changes?

Yes.

You spelt my name wrong.


Anyway, my reasoning is 50 site frequence is fun, score graphs are essential to keeping track of what is happening around you, and provience trades are typically tied to NAPs or whatever.

[GFSnl]

Fine with me.

[SirMu]

No problem here, either.

[kennoseishin]

The change to site frequency and diplomacy rules sounds fine to me. As for the score graph, well, I suppose I'm cool with that. Yeah, it makes everyone's positions clear, but it also eliminates most of the information brokering/propaganda minigame.

[CthulhuDreams]

The change to site frequency and diplomacy rules sounds fine to me. As for the score graph, well, I suppose I'm cool with that. Yeah, it makes everyone's positions clear, but it also eliminates most of the information brokering/propaganda minigame.

I think you'll be surprised how much it doesn't. In my limited experience, while you can check how big someone is from the graph, where someone is, and what they are doing is just as relevant.

Diplomacy (the board game) has more information available about board position, and that has a huge amount of information brokering ad grey press!

[jimbojones1971]

Turns out everyone got their first choice of nation, which is excellent.

The game is now up at llamaserver and ready for people to submit their pretenders:

http://www.llamaserver.net/gameinfo.cgi?game=n00bsOfDoom

If you could put a post in the thread letting me know when you have posted your pretender (to make sure no-one tries to jump the queue and steal your place) that would be great :-)

[jimbojones1971]

I notice that quite a few of you (who have just created accounts I suspect) haven't turned on the PM (private message) function on the forum user control panel.

I'd recommend you do this, as a lot of diplomacy is conducted this way (its a lot quicker and easier than just using the in-game messaging function).

The guys who have PMs off are: GFSnl; Decrepus; and Tzarin.

[SirMu]

Alright, I've submitted my pretender.

[kennoseishin]

I've submitted mine too.

[GFSnl]

Submitted my pretender. :)

[jimbojones1971]

Put mine in last night, and Oceania's might also be in.

I'll chase the last guy, and then we are away :)

[GFSnl]

C'mon, c'mon ... let's KILLLL ...:)

[jimbojones1971]

C'mon, c'mon ... let's KILLLL ...:)
Yes, I too am keen for some killing :D

I'll go back to doing some more whinging at the other dude again, to get him to hurry up. I really want to know where I am on the map!

[jimbojones1971]

Not sure how long we'll be waiting on CthulhuDreams for, he promised to get his pretender in yesterday but here we are. Oh well, we'll get there I guess.

[CthulhuDreams]

Sorry, I have been very sick. My pretender is in now. Apologies for the delay.

[jimbojones1971]

Guys, I screwed up with my pretender (didn't switch off the CBM mod before making him), so I've had to restart the game.

Really really sorry for this.

Anyway, make sure you ignore the first file it sent you use the new one that will be out shortly.

[GFSnl]

Alright we're kickin'

Be prepared to be scraped of my boots you lowlife scumb...

I mean good game to everyone :D

[SirMu]

Ai, let's have some fun brutally destroying the other nation's pitiful and weak armies and cultures.

[jimbojones1971]

Awww, you guys are making me feel all warm and fuzzy inside.

Oh wait, my mistake - that is just the reflected heat from funeral pyres that my inquisitors are building to burn you heretics alive! :D

[kennoseishin]

The celestial bureaucracy will sort you all out in due time. We'll liberate all people from the oppression of your barbaric cultures! :angel

[tzarin]

The only liberation will be heads from shoulders from Shinuyama blades... it has begun!

[jimbojones1971]

Is it too late to mention that the Grand High Inquisitors of Marignon are by nature a peace loving bunch, and that our witch burnings are merely a quaint ethnographic practice designed to attract tourists?

[CthulhuDreams]

Alright, Captain Ahab and Oceania are staking claim to all underwater territories, and the land provinces adjacent to my capital. I will not make aggressive moves onto the surface except for that provinces that are adjacent to my capital until further notice.

[SirMu]

C'mon Caelum, let's get this show on the road!

[Decrepus]

Jotunheim, I must make it clear that I have territorial claims on Banded Hills and will be occupying it next turn. It is neighboring my capital so I hope you understand. ;)

And I think we might have to talk about province 115 since that is equidistant, email would be the best way to reach me if we want to talk about it.

[jimbojones1971]

Wow, Shinuyama has gone nuts on the army graph. I'm guessing that Zhu Rong got the event with all the militia (or national equivalent - I seem to get flagellents). Nice to have at this stage of the game, if that's the case :)

[kennoseishin]

Huh. I'm surprised Bandar is forgoing diplomacy entirely. Ah well. I hope he doesn't mind getting his pretender cursed, marked, etc.

Edit: I'm fine with negotiation, but if you're just going to move that close to my capital without a word, I'm just going to assume the worst.

[SirMu]

Sounds like the apes have made an enemy.

[jimbojones1971]

Sounds like the apes have made an enemy.

Pretty sure its actually a primate mating ritual.

In which case, maybe we can re-enact king kong in the game, but with a T'ien C'hi princess?

[kennoseishin]

Sounds like the apes have made an enemy.

Pretty sure its actually a primate mating ritual.

In which case, maybe we can re-enact king kong in the game, but with a T'ien C'hi princess?

Great, just what I need. Now I'll have to double the guard for my imperial consort -.-

[Decrepus]

Huh. I'm surprised Bandar is forgoing diplomacy entirely. Ah well. I hope he doesn't mind getting his pretender cursed, marked, etc.

Edit: I'm fine with negotiation, but if you're just going to move that close to my capital without a word, I'm just going to assume the worst.

I am forgoing diplomacy if "without a word" means with a message and "that close to your capital" is the province next to MY capital.

[kennoseishin]

Hah. We just had asymmetric intel, that's all. Your dominion saw my capital, but I had no clue who's dominion that was or how far their capital was from me. Also, messages sent in-game take a turn to arrive, so I'd advise using forum messages in the future. Thankfully we were able to avoid an "incident" this time around.

[Decrepus]

Gauging by your position I am going to be hopelessly pinned into this mountain range. I believe war will be an inevitable eventuality between us.

[kennoseishin]

Yeah, this map ended up being terribad. We're crammed in the side with 6 to 8 provinces each, while everyone else gets 20 or so.

[SirMu]

I'm warning you, Caelum. Stay away or suffer the wrath of the giants!

[jimbojones1971]

Yeah, this map ended up being terribad. We're crammed in the side with 6 to 8 provinces each, while everyone else gets 20 or so.

OK, that's really not very cool. Maybe next time fixed starts would be a better plan?

Alternatively, I recommend building manuals of water breathing and taking to the ocean, I am sure Oceania has so many provinces that he won't mind if you take a few ...

[SirMu]

Or we could just brutally murder one another until there are only 3 people on land.

Edit: And then brutally murder some more.

[Decrepus]

Tien, for the good of both our people, your people must die.

[jimbojones1971]

Or we could just brutally murder one another until there are only 3 people on land.

Edit: And then brutally murder some more.

Why are you discriminating against the sea dwellers? Won't Oceania's feelings be hurt if we don't brutally murder him too?

Equal brutal murders for finned folk too! :fight:

[kennoseishin]

Tien, for the good of both our people, your people must die.

So in other words, for the good of all of us except the ones who are dead?

I haven't run out of cake yet, monkeyman! Believe me, I'm still alive!
:p

[jimbojones1971]

I haven't run out of cake yet, monkeyman!

Wait, you've got cake? Quick, everyone - stacks on TC - HE'S GOT CAKE!!! :D

[tzarin]

Just quietly... I hear the oceans are full of cake...

[jimbojones1971]

Just quietly... I hear the oceans are full of cake...

Mmmmm, cake. Anyone fancy a swim and some cake? I hear every piece comes with a free water gem.

[CthulhuDreams]

Then I harvest death gems from your corpse with the sickle of unending pain.

:)

[Decrepus]

This is probably a dumb question, but in my Sent Items tab for private messages it is empty. Shouldn't I be able to see the messages I sent? Is anyone getting my messages? Hello? Can anyone hear me?

:confused:

Thanks Calahan.

[Calahan]

This is probably a dumb question, but in my Sent Items tab for private messages it is empty. Shouldn't I be able to see the messages I sent? Is anyone getting my messages? Hello? Can anyone hear me?

:confused:
The Private Messaging system on these forums (currently) does not automatically save the PM's you send to your sent folder.

To keep a copy of the PM's you send in your sent box, you need to tick a box below the message in the 'Additional Options' section. The box you need to tick is called something like "Save a copy of this message in your Sent Messages folder". If you tick this box before sending the message, then a copy will be saved in your sent folder.

It's very annoying to have to do that all the time, and many users have asked for sent messages to be saved automatically. But currently they are not, so your only option right now is to manually tick the box each time :(

[jimbojones1971]

The Private Messaging system on these forums (currently) does not automatically save the PM's you send to your sent folder.

Yeah, I had a pretty major panic attack when I first started using the forums and realised I couldn't find my sent messages.

That is why when I am negotiating, I usually quote back the relevant bit from the other guy's email (as they may no longer have the original).

[kennoseishin]

This was a triumph! I'm making a note here: HUGE SUCCESS!
:D

[Decrepus]

Tien'Chi, you've changed nothing. Your nation has the attention of those infinitely your greater. That which you know as Bandar Log is your salvation through destruction.

We will find another way.

[jimbojones1971]

Interesting turn.

On the downside, my temple got destroyed by an earthquake this turn.

On the upside, the kind folks at T'ien C'hi sent a large number of aid packages of "Great Wyrm Tasty Fried Snacks" for the survivors, which had greatly helped. I have to say, nothing refreshes like the taste of a deep fried Great Wyrm.

Although I have to ask, how is it that T'ien C'hi came to have 15 tons of dead Great Wyrm to hand to make these?

In un-related news, shares in Bandar Log are down in trading today at the "Gods-R-Us" stock exchange.

[SirMu]

I hear Bandar Log's shares in the "Capitals-R-Us" stock exchange is about to go down, too.

[jimbojones1971]

I hear Bandar Log's shares in the "Capitals-R-Us" stock exchange is about to go down, too.

Will this be before or after Bandar finishes exterminating the entire population of TC for their own good, do you think? :)

[kennoseishin]

I hear Bandar Log's shares in the "Capitals-R-Us" stock exchange is about to go down, too.

Will this be before or after Bandar finishes exterminating the entire population of TC for their own good, do you think? :)

Haha. Neither one, I believe. Elephants don't trample too well when they've got lances stuck in their sides.

[SirMu]

I hear Bandar Log's shares in the "Capitals-R-Us" stock exchange is about to go down, too.

Will this be before or after Bandar finishes exterminating the entire population of TC for their own good, do you think? :)

Haha. Neither one, I believe. Elephants don't trample too well when they've got lances stuck in their sides.

True facts.

Edit: Unless they turn undead. Gawd, Undead Elephants would be the worst.

[jimbojones1971]

Will this be before or after Bandar finishes exterminating the entire population of TC for their own good, do you think? :)

Haha. Neither one, I believe. Elephants don't trample too well when they've got lances stuck in their sides.

True facts.

Edit: Unless they turn undead. Gawd, Undead Elephants would be the worst.

Undead elephants - man, got to get me some of those :D

[jimbojones1971]

At the moment it seems like Caelum (number of provinces, first to get the second fort down) and Oceania (gem income, position) might be the powers to watch?

All though all of us are doing pretty well at the moment, from what I can see, so it is promising to be an interesting game.

[GFSnl]

Yeah... it was a good turn for me.
First i got me a free fort and then my commander won the tournament.
Although that wasn't very difficult as nobody had the nerve to compete ... weak :re:

[kennoseishin]

I had a guy scheduled to compete, but scripts for dueling aren't good for open warfare, sadly -.- Barbarian horseman whatshisname shall be remembered.

[SirMu]

At the moment it seems like Caelum (number of provinces, first to get the second fort down) and Oceania (gem income, position) might be the powers to watch?

All though all of us are doing pretty well at the moment, from what I can see, so it is promising to be an interesting game.

You can't really call anyone a power to watch at this point; it's just too early. Although they do have strong positions, that much is for certain.

[GFSnl]

He, if you've got some spare time one your hands you should check this "Let's Play" out on the something awful forum.

Or if everybody already knows about this one you can call me Noob or something... :(

http://forums.somethingawful.com/showthread.php?threadid=3302467&userid=0&perpage=40&pagenumber=1

[jimbojones1971]

He, if you've got some spare time one your hands you should check this "Let's Play" out on the something awful forum.

Or if everybody already knows about this one you can call me Noob or something... :(

http://forums.somethingawful.com/showthread.php?threadid=3302467&userid=0&perpage=40&pagenumber=1

Looks fun, thanks I'll check it out.

[SirMu]

Oh hey, that thing. I read it earlier but never got to finish it.

[CthulhuDreams]

I'm still thinking about the offers made this turn. I'm not attacking one (Oceania is still inward looking) so I've put a turn up.

The sea ponies will get back to you however, if you have been talking to you.

[tzarin]

if you have been talking to you... I think the sea ponies are drunk... or at least need to learn land-grammar.

[SirMu]

Oh gawd did I stale last turn? I did...damn.

[CthulhuDreams]

if you have been talking to you... I think the sea ponies are drunk... or at least need to learn land-grammar.

Grammar ninjas sea ponies are.

[GFSnl]

Greetings,

the good citizens of Caelum have decided to no longer be bounded by the shekels of irrelevant treaties.

Therefore any treaties we had with the giant earthbound people of Jotunheim are hereby declared void.

As the Caelum people are honorable the agreements of the past will be honored until expiry. Beyond that only the wind know the direction our countries will fly.

With high regards,

Hocus Pocus.

[GFSnl]

:doh:

Damned spell control. Of course it's shackles not shekels.

Who said flying people are good spellers. :p

[SirMu]

She shakes her head; She attempted to reason with your people, Caelum, but they were unreasonable. She attempted to be friends with your people, but they were unfriendly. She attempted to prevent a war with your people, but they were far too war loving.

She will give you the benefit of the doubt and not strike unless you do first; but be warned, hordes of the giants shall be waiting, and so shall She...

[CthulhuDreams]

:doh:

Damned spell control. Of course it's shackles not shekels.

Who said flying people are good spellers. :p

Non-terrestrial high fivesssssssss

[GFSnl]

:doh:

Damned spell control. Of course it's shackles not shekels.

Who said flying people are good spellers. :p

Non-terrestrial high fivesssssssss

:D

That's right.
Landlubbers, Tsss...

[SirMu]

You'll never be as good at lubbering land as us.

[jimbojones1971]

Seems to be everyone wants a piece of She from Jotunheim at the moment.

[kennoseishin]

Now that was an epic battle. The sky was filled with fire and steel, and the very corpses of those slain under Jotunheim's unjust rule did rise up against their oppressors! Our imperial army was outnumbered two to one, but righteousness was on our side and we did prevail!

Perhaps She will think twice before relying on men that are as steadfast as her treaties.

[tzarin]

The Lord of Shinuyama has witnessed the atrocities of the Jotumheim giants against our distant kin, the people of TC. No longer could we remain as bystanders to such actions which insult our sense of honour.

After reviewing the matter with the Council of War, the forces of Shinuyama have liberated the south western provinces of the Jots and will continue to make war until She can be brought to peace with her neighbors and guarantee the sovereignty of TC.

The Lord of Shinuyama is happy to receive peace envoys from the Jots for negotiations, should they be serious about meeting our demands.

[SirMu]

Now that was an epic battle. The sky was filled with fire and steel, and the very corpses of those slain under Jotunheim's unjust rule did rise up against their oppressors! Our imperial army was outnumbered two to one, but righteousness was on our side and we did prevail!

Perhaps She will think twice before relying on men that are as steadfast as her treaties.

Good thing the majority of my losses were simple province defenders and mercenaries, eh? And that your armies were reduced to many corpses?

You shall be mopped up soon enough.

The Lord of Shinuyama has witnessed the atrocities of the Jotumheim giants against our distant kin, the people of TC. No longer could we remain as bystanders to such actions which insult our sense of honour.

After reviewing the matter with the Council of War, the forces of Shinuyama have liberated the south western provinces of the Jots and will continue to make war until She can be brought to peace with her neighbors and guarantee the sovereignty of TC.

The Lord of Shinuyama is happy to receive peace envoys from the Jots for negotiations, should they be serious about meeting our demands.

Hahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahaha
hahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahah
ahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahaha
hahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahaha
hahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahaha haha.

Ha.

[kennoseishin]

I must say, those Jotun have the Dark One's own luck when it comes to retreating.

Or maybe it's just from all the practice they've had. Hmm.

[jimbojones1971]

Through pure chance, some religious pilgrims from the Holy Land of Marignon witnessed the battle between T'ien C'hi and Jotunheim in the Hexwoods, in this month just passed.

A few observations from Friar Anfar follow:
"The heathens from Jotunheim had an over preponderance of archers, with an insufficient number of melee troops to cover their front line. What melee troops they did have were mostly second rate giants, in insufficient numbers.

The heretics from T'ien C'hi, in contrast, had a more balanced army with large numbers of footmen covering off the front, and some elite cavalry units on their right flank, backed by archers.

In the battle proper, the arrows from the heathens (Jotunheim) bounced harmlessly off the wall shields of the heretics (T'ien C'hi). In contrast, the heretics (TC) were able to drive the giants frontline fighters into retreat through a combination of massed arrow fire and stabbing at their oversized feet with spears,

Once the heathenish giant foot soliders (J) fled the field, the heretics cavalry and footmen (TC) closed with the archers in the rear and rapidly put them to flight.

Of note, the heathen's prophet was at the battle, but chose to flee rather than die honouring the good name of his false god. Such cowardice makes me sick!

After the battle, I celebrated the horrible death of so many of the ungodly from both sides (curse them!) with a good meal and a small witch burning. Glory to the Great Lord Torquemada the Merciful!!"

[SirMu]

Between unfortunate losses and three enemies, She shall now retreat into the darkness; She shall leave behind a false self to die in her place, while the real She is off rebuilding her power. This is not the last of She. She shall return.

And when She does...

You will all pay!

(Going AI because there's not much else I can do at this point; one lucky nation shall receive my vast stores of gold and gems.)

As a postmortum account:

Ever since the start of the game when She found herself so close to so many nations, She knew She would have to go to war with one of them; it just so happened that Bandar Log was not only the easiest target, but She would receive 1500 gold from T'ien Ch'i for the act! That and a castle, of course. But She got greedy. She proceeded to attack T'ien Ch'i as well after the apes were crushed; why not have 1500 gold and a castle? Not to mention even another castle! This would not have been so bad if She had not had to deal with the sea dwellers encroaching on her land, not that she could do much about it, and a preparing for a possible war against Caelum. She worked 'with' Shinuyama against Caelum, but She knew, way in the back of her mind, that She would be betrayed. She didn't act against Shinuyama sooner on the off chance he was actually telling the truth; it's not like with her full funds going to war against T'ien Ch'i that she could pay for a first strike on a second front. T'ien Ch'i was smart in that it diverted most of its attention to research and mercenaries as soon as the war started; not only did this combination give it a surprising edge in battle, but will likely allow T'ien Ch'i to survive any double crosses from Caelum or Shinuyama.

Ultimately, She feels like She would have been in a better position, if only She had gone to war with Caelum instead of T'ien Ch'i, because even though they were more powerful, there likely would not have been as many diplomatic land mines. This is excluding, of course, the chance of T'ien Ch'i double crossing her. Which was entirely likely, considering T'ien Ch'i hadn't signed a NAP with us 'Jots' yet.

From a military perspective, Marignon is right. She had too many archers. Though this helped in battle against the masses of monkeys, it quickly fell flat on its face against the shield bearing T'ien Ch'i.

Oh well, it was a fun run.

[jimbojones1971]

Good game SirMu, it was fun playing with you (and She, of course!). Once you get dog piled by a few people, including the strongest nation on the board (Caelum), that's pretty much it from what I can tell. And after seeing events in 84 and 93 this turn, I think going AI is a fair call at this point as its basically all over.

And thanks for telling us about the deal with TC etc, its always fun to know more about what actually happened :)

Hope to you see again next game!

[GFSnl]

Aaawww... thanks JimboJones1971 by calling me the strongest. You're not doing so badly yourself :D.
Are you sure you're not trying to instigate something...:rolleyes:

Nonetheless,

SirMu thanks for playing. It would have been interesting if you had attack me earlier. You can see in my research graph my research lagged and it hasn't been a lot of turns since I have thunder strike.

See you next game.

[jimbojones1971]

Aaawww... thanks JimboJones1971 by calling me the strongest. You're not doing so badly yourself :D.
Are you sure you're not trying to instigate something...:rolleyes:

What, me? (Cue innocent look.)

Anyway, the important thing to remember is that its those darned fish people that we've all got to keep an eye on, what with their webbed feet and water breathing ways. :D

[GFSnl]

Anyway, the important thing to remember is that its those darned fish people that we've all got to keep an eye on, what with their webbed feet and water breathing ways. :D

Now that is something we can agree on. :D

[CthulhuDreams]

Anyway, the important thing to remember is that its those darned fish people that we've all got to keep an eye on, what with their webbed feet and water breathing ways. :D

Now that is something we can agree on. :D

My sea ponies have detachable webbing, so we are only slimy some of the time, and of course, we are not slimy now.

More seriously, my ponies have sore .. tails.. and I'm not intrested in going on the offensive at the moment. Rest assured though that if my two neighbours get any big ideas about restricting my free ranging ponies, both your capitals offer bench front views!

The real reason those two are talking tough about me is that they are trying to distract attention from the fact they are the largest and second largest nations, and scouts assure me that Caelum has bypassed a number of indie proviences.. so he is going to get even BIGGER.

Don't let the worlds most basic disinfomation campagin distract you from the real issue - who is Caelum going to punch next, as his armies are clearly mustered for war.

So are marigon's too - what the hell is the go with his army graph. Though Caelum's flying bird men are a good counter for Marigon's hordes of dudes with crossbows.

[jimbojones1971]

Methinks Oceania sounds a bit too defensive? Could it be that Ahab of Oceania is afraid that someone might look at Oceania's position way up the top of the income graph, and his huuuuuuuge stash of cash, and start to wonder if he was, oh I don't know, maybe running away with the game or something? :eek:

[SirMu]

Don't worry Oceania, I won't tell anyone about the giant earthquake generator you're building. Your secret it safe with the ghost of She.

[jimbojones1971]

Don't worry Oceania, I won't tell anyone about the giant earthquake generator you're building. Your secret it safe with the ghost of She.

OK, I laughed out loud when I read that :D

[kennoseishin]

Don't worry Oceania, I won't tell anyone about the giant earthquake generator you're building. Your secret it safe with the ghost of She.

Oceania has catfish (http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Namazu_(Japanese_mythology)) technology? :shock: They must be stopped!

[CthulhuDreams]

Methinks Oceania sounds a bit too defensive? Could it be that Ahab of Oceania is afraid that someone might look at Oceania's position way up the top of the income graph, and his huuuuuuuge stash of cash, and start to wonder if he was, oh I don't know, maybe running away with the game or something? :eek:

That's become I'm an order power - I'm going to have more income. High fives.

The downside is I don't have sacred researchers, so most of that is going on upkeep :(

[jimbojones1971]

Wait, Oceania has catfish AND order? Noooooooooo! Flee for your lives from the well ordered fish!

[jimbojones1971]

Any more trash talk after the new turn? My temple burnt down, and a ton of brigands moved in, so all in all a pretty annoying turn in the land of the witch burners. :hurt:

[kennoseishin]

A vampire tried to take over one of my provinces and was swiftly staked. All in all, nothing much happened of note.

[GFSnl]

Hee... Jimbo,

How are you preparing to conquer the world?

(Can't hurt to ask nicely, is it)

Greetz.

[GFSnl]

...and stop killing my scouts.

Or I'll have to send better ones. :mad:

[SirMu]

She is curious how the ultimately futile battles between the minor nations (see: All of you) are going.

[tzarin]

Independants are winning lol. Well kicking my *** at least.

[jimbojones1971]

Hee... Jimbo,

How are you preparing to conquer the world?

(Can't hurt to ask nicely, is it)

Greetz.


Yo, GFSnl. Why don't you just send some scouts and see for yourself? :)

...and stop killing my scouts.

Or I'll have to send better ones. :mad:

Oh wait, you did .... yeah, sorry about that. :doh:

[jimbojones1971]

Oceania's a bit late, so I've give him an eight hour extension in the hope he doesn't stale.

[jimbojones1971]

8 hour delay as TC hasn't posted yet.

[kennoseishin]

I appreciate Oceania's loan of territory. I was behind in income for quite a while; it's nice to be back in the running. I hope Ahab received those carrier pigeons I sent. Flying over the ocean took a lot out of them.

[jimbojones1971]

I appreciate Oceania's loan of territory. I was behind in income for quite a while; it's nice to be back in the running. I hope Ahab received those carrier pigeons I sent. Flying over the ocean took a lot out of them.

Sounds like fun :-D

I'm running late at work, so going to bump the turn by a couple of hours. Apologies, guys.

[CthulhuDreams]

I appreciate Oceania's loan of territory. I was behind in income for quite a while; it's nice to be back in the running. I hope Ahab received those carrier pigeons I sent. Flying over the ocean took a lot out of them.

No-one has lost an army yet - that will actually decide things.

Edit: It's probably at the point where you could extend things to 36 hours.

[jimbojones1971]

Anyone else object to moving to 36 hour turns?

[GFSnl]

36 hours is fine by me.

On another note.

I just happened to fly a little over Caelums borders to test my newly purchased Wing-Wax 2000.
It's to dazzle the chicks with my shiny feathers while I'll do a combined 360 with screw in mid air, that I saw this great gathering of fish and land animals who were having a blast at kicking each others skulls in.
Although the fishies had to leave early, it looked like fun.

Greetz

[kennoseishin]

36 hours would be good for me too.

And I'm glad that battle had an observer, GFSnl. Sadly, my troops were too busy fighting to see your test flight, but it's probably for the best. My rank and file are a *tad* xenophobic and would have likely taken pot shots at you. So I'd recommend avoiding cities for now. I'm sure they'll be more friendly to neighbors once this conflict is over with.

On a positive note, my prototype Green Lions were a huge success! Their fiery acid breath both cooks and tenderizes, for a perfect horse steak every time! Lu-xing, their developer and technician, will be duly rewarded with the title "Iron Chef".

P.S. Aquatic war trolls? Now I've seen everything!

Edit: Apparently some of my troops did in fact take potshots at an overhead scout after the battle was over. I apologize for their overzealousness, and I hope this does not create any tension between both our fine nations.

[GFSnl]

Edit: Apparently some of my troops did in fact take potshots at an overhead scout after the battle was over. I apologize for their overzealousness, and I hope this does not create any tension between both our fine nations.

The ministry of Truth has, after rigorous research, concluded that neither the burned arrow as the green bile found on the body of the scout was the cause of death.

The rapport showed that on a sunny day Wing-Wax 2000 becomes liquid and reduces aerodynamic properties of feathers. In normal situations this poses no problem but only when flying upside down.
It's still a mystery as to why this experienced scout was flying in that position.

Wing-Wax 2000 Inc. will be fined 100 million bird seeds and the CEO's bonus is reduced from 50 million to 49.98 million bird seeds.

We hope this unfortunate incident causes no harm to our warm diplomatic relations.

Singed,

Tweety, The ministry Of Truth.

[tzarin]

In news from the lands of Shinuyama, Bogus and his crew have visited... again. In hindsight, hunting down and murdering his family then desecrating their bodies after his first visit was perhaps not the "ideal" course of action. Nevertheless a few intercontinental ballistic arrows were sent and have greatly reduced the threat ahead of our most magnanimous armies re-taking the land.

[jimbojones1971]

OK, I have tweaked it to 36 hours hosting time (extended current turn by 12 hours, and changed the setting).

In other news, anyone want to take bets on how Oceania will celebrate his ultimate victory? At the rate that dude is putting up globals, battle outcomes are basically irrelevant :)

[kennoseishin]

In other news, anyone want to take bets on how Oceania will celebrate his ultimate victory? At the rate that dude is putting up globals, battle outcomes are basically irrelevant :)

Hah. I'm not that worried. 15 gems/turn is nice, but not game-winning, and gift of health only improves his turtling. His troops already have recuperation, and he doesn't have old-age mages. Besides, I have it on good authority that Mother Oak is going down, soon. And there aren't many globals that can be cast underwater :D

[jimbojones1971]

In other news, anyone want to take bets on how Oceania will celebrate his ultimate victory? At the rate that dude is putting up globals, battle outcomes are basically irrelevant :)

Hah. I'm not that worried. 15 gems/turn is nice, but not game-winning, and gift of health only improves his turtling. His troops already have recuperation, and he doesn't have old-age mages. Besides, I have it on good authority that Mother Oak is going down, soon. And there aren't many globals that can be cast underwater :D

Must be time for the happy dance, in that case :-)

[kennoseishin]

In other news, anyone want to take bets on how Oceania will celebrate his ultimate victory? At the rate that dude is putting up globals, battle outcomes are basically irrelevant :)

Hah. I'm not that worried. 15 gems/turn is nice, but not game-winning, and gift of health only improves his turtling. His troops already have recuperation, and he doesn't have old-age mages. Besides, I have it on good authority that Mother Oak is going down, soon. And there aren't many globals that can be cast underwater :D

Must be time for the happy dance, in that case :-)

The happy dance will have to be postponed, I'm afraid. Earth Blood Deep Well is a bit more serious a matter.

I wish Oceania would just come out and fight.

[CthulhuDreams]

And now I've punched one of your gargoyles to death, and then I punched most of your army to death. Unfortunately the gargoyle did almost all your casulties before dying (the ponce), but I will have my SC's coming back at you soon you - then I will fight bwahahahhaha-AHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA.

Bwahaha.

Still, despite me having three gem gen globals up, Caelum is only just behind me on gem income, so don't ignore him for this side show :P

[jimbojones1971]

Do you think Oceania is already planning his victory parade post global-domination? I'm pretty sure he is. My tip is the the highlight of the parade will be an undead Michael Jackson doing the moonwalk down the main avenue of Caelum's capital.

We in Marignon salute our new fishy overlords, and wish to note that our previous propensity for BBQ-ing them in a tasty chilli sauce was an merely expression of our cultural identity and should be taken as a sign of respect rather than hostility.

[kennoseishin]

Yeah, that was unfortunate scripting on my part. Tangle vines really messes up SCs. Ah well, live and learn.

Edit: And after that "explosive enchantress" incident, I daresay we're about equal on gem loss. Ouch.

[CthulhuDreams]

To all concerned,

Shinuyama has seen fit to attack me through a non aggression pact without notice, so I guess everyone else can see their agreements as 'non binding' :)

Text below

[11:18] Me: Which brings us to our deal
[11:18] Me: NAP 3?
[11:18] The guy playing Shinyama: sure

No notice was recieved.

[kennoseishin]

Huh. This may seem an obvious question, but was that "NAP for 3 months", or "NAP with 3 month's warning"?

[tzarin]

I do not dispute the fact we had a NAP with Oceania, even though the evidence presented was doctored. For anyone to believe we would agree to such things of import in such an off-handed manner is insulting.

Yet let us focus on the issue at hand. It is with a great sadness that Shinuyama once again had to take action against the unprovoked aggression of another nation.

Our slowness to respond to such blatant war mongering was solely due to the aforementioned NAP, an agreement which we hold to the highest degree of importance and legality. However after many arguments within the Council of War, it was decided that the defensive pact between our nation and TC took precedence and forced us to act. Had Oceania not attacked first then we would not be in this situation.

We are not to blame if the fish men of Oceania failed to heed the lessons of recent history, for it was not so long ago when the honorable and chivalrous nations of Caelum and Shimuyama intervened to stop the first great aggressor of Jotenheim.

I assure my fellows that all agreements will be honored by our nation, with the above situations taken into account.

Additionally as soon as the fish men are returned to the Sea - which I will confirm with my commanders has been acheived just now - the forces of Shinuyama will return to their castles and allow them to live their lives without interference.

P.S. caviar is back on the menu and delicious

[jimbojones1971]

P.S. caviar is back on the menu and delicious

While I in no way wish to condone unprovoked war warmongering, I feel compelled to ask - may I too please have some caviare? International alliances are important, but at moments like this culinary satisfaction must also be considered.

[CthulhuDreams]

I do not dispute the fact we had a NAP with Oceania, even though the evidence presented was doctored. For anyone to believe we would agree to such things of import in such an off-handed manner is insulting.

Yet let us focus on the issue at hand. It is with a great sadness that Shinuyama once again had to take action against the unprovoked aggression of another nation.

Our slowness to respond to such blatant war mongering was solely due to the aforementioned NAP, an agreement which we hold to the highest degree of importance and legality. However after many arguments within the Council of War, it was decided that the defensive pact between our nation and TC took precedence and forced us to act. Had Oceania not attacked first then we would not be in this situation.

We are not to blame if the fish men of Oceania failed to heed the lessons of recent history, for it was not so long ago when the honorable and chivalrous nations of Caelum and Shimuyama intervened to stop the first great aggressor of Jotenheim.

I assure my fellows that all agreements will be honored by our nation, with the above situations taken into account.

Additionally as soon as the fish men are returned to the Sea - which I will confirm with my commanders has been acheived just now - the forces of Shinuyama will return to their castles and allow them to live their lives without interference.

P.S. caviar is back on the menu and delicious

I can also post documented evidence of him agreeing to attack TC, so this is, needless to say, lying.

Just fyi.

[kennoseishin]

Wow, that's hilarious. Neverhealing units regain hitpoints even if they're sieging a castle with a lab.

[jimbojones1971]

I'm keen for some Astral peals, I've got fire, air, water and nature to offer in return.

PM me if you'd like to trade :-)

[CthulhuDreams]

Amateur hour continues - TC gets resoundingly defeated while trying to take the castle that Shinyuma had already expended a big force against - 7 commanders going down beneath the heels of my golem, along with 150 tiny men :)

If you're going to 2 v 1 me, including stabbing me THROUGH a NAP, you should atleast have a plan to win. Just an FYI.

[kennoseishin]

I haven't checked the turn yet, but it sounds like you won? Honestly it's about time; you have a huge advantage in gems and mages, and used to lead in income too, while I've been at war from practically turn 1.

Edit: What the hell? That's not even amusing. My mages went off script on round 1 just to save on gems, and since that wind guide didn't go up my bane lord gets crushed by a meteor. Whatever, game, what-ever.

[kennoseishin]

And to top it all off, I fast-forwarded through 10 or so variations on that same battle and won. every. single one. That victory was a frikin' fluke of the RNG, even with my mages deciding to be frugal all of a sudden!

[GFSnl]

***Breaking Alert***

CIA (Cealum Intelligence Agency) breach.

CealumLeaks has just released new evidence of the atrocities of the Oceania - Tien 'Chi war.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=2nCNrvkJQUc

Quality is meh... we're practicing.

***-***

[kennoseishin]

lol. Just my luck that those failmages are my youtube debut. Ah well, here's some audio I was able to recover from my bane lord's black box.

Round 1: "...just three score troops? Forget battle doctrine, we can take them easily..."

Round 3: "...did Lu-xing just take out our bane lord? Damn, Zhuge Liang is gonna be pissed"

Round 4: "****, a golem! What were the orders again? Fire arrows and... what? Hurry, do something!"

[CthulhuDreams]

Does wind guide even affect big rocks from the sky? If so, I didn't know that. If so, EVEN FUNNIER.

Edit: As to my effectiveness, Oceania is argueably the worst MA race in the game. But yeah, let's take it from here.

[jimbojones1971]

Oceania is argueably the worst MA race in the game.

There seems to be a school of thought that Oceania is basically an incomplete nation capability wise (when compared to the other MA nations), hence it being so crap.

I think UNWIN (or whatever it is called) takes a stab at fixing that, doesn't it?

[kennoseishin]

I'll need a 12 hour extension or so, due to a project I'm working on.

Also, I find it somewhat hilarious that my own PD worked against me. But there's a certain logic to that; in a battle between legends, mundanes just get in the way.

Edit: So thanks, Cthulhu, for clearing the stage for our showdown.

[jimbojones1971]

I've put up a 12 hour extension, as a few people are struggling with the due time.

[GFSnl]

***Special message***

As you probably all have seen, the good people of Caelum had to attack one of our neighbors.

This is not some baseless aggression. And the people of Caelum would never have agreed to such a drastic measures if there were not some heavy weighing arguments leading to this outcome.

This real provocateur is none else than Shinuyama herself.
As you're probably thinking, it was not because she attacked two countries without warning. The nation we all loved and cared about, the gentle giants of Jotunheim and the beautiful, intelligent and slightly wet inhabitants of Oceania.
Nor was it because goblins have slightly deformed heads and although small they are still to large to swallow whole.

No... it was because of the evidence presented below. Which after close inspection leaves no doubt that this is a just and righteous war.

We rest our case.

[jimbojones1971]

***Special message***

As you probably all have seen, the good people of Caelum had to attack one of our neighbors.

This is not some baseless aggression. And the people of Caelum would never have agreed to such a drastic measures if there were not some heavy weighing arguments leading to this outcome.

This real provocateur is none else than Shinuyama herself.
As you're probably thinking, it was not because she attacked two countries without warning. The nation we all loved and cared about, the gentle giants of Jotunheim and the beautiful, intelligent and slightly wet inhabitants of Oceania.
Nor was it because goblins have slightly deformed heads and although small they are still to large to swallow whole.

No... it was because of the evidence presented below. Which after close inspection leaves no doubt that this is a just and righteous war.

We rest our case.

OK, that is totally awesome :-D

I've postponed the game as TC staled last turn, and I'd rather that we avoid having it happen again this turn.

[GFSnl]

The last activity of Kennoseishin was on the 8th 8 days ago.
Don't think he's coming back. :(

[jimbojones1971]

OK, thanks for checking that out.

I'll pause the game and look for a sub. Worst case, we set him to AI.

[Numahr]

There has been a coup. I have the honor to introduce myself as Tien Chi's New Emperor, and I accept your tributes as of now.

Hum... in case you are not yet a tributary province of the empire, you are welcome to send a copy of our diplomatic treaties and relations to our chancellerie for eehh.. double check. Not that we have lost them, I precise, the Imperial bureaucracy, in fact never makes mistakes.

So anyway let me know if you want any existing treaty continued by the new Imperial bureacracy!

[GFSnl]

Hey, Numahr,

welcome to our noobie game.

I'm Caelum and until now there have been no animosities between us. But we also haven't had any Non Attack Pacts.

Greetz,

Hocus Pocus.

[jimbojones1971]

OK, so we are now back on track thanks to Numahr who has kindly stepped in to help us - yay!

[Numahr]

The bureacratic reform we have engaged needs a bit more time than first estimated by the CCIRR (Consultative Commission for Imperial Reform and Reorganization).
(in other words I still need a bit of time to adapt to the strange nation I have inherited)

Therefore I would like to ask for a 24-hour delay.

Thanks in advance

[jimbojones1971]

I've extended the game by 24 hours - I got requests from both TC (which I may have missed - apologies if so) and Oceania.

[jimbojones1971]

I think this might be the last turn for the current Shinuyama player, as he's about to head off for a month of travels.

Do people want to find a sub, or just set him to AI? From what I can see he's got one decent army left, so there could still be some mischief left, even if the long term prospects are rather bleak.

[jimbojones1971]

OK, since no one has objected, and the current player asked to be set to AI, I'll flick Shinuyama to AI from this turn onwards.

[GFSnl]

Tzarin should set his game on A.I. and if he's already on vacation maybe somebody who isn't playing could turn it on A.I..

[CthulhuDreams]

I <3 my global enchantments, and I still think I'm doomed :(

[Numahr]

Hi,

I am a bit stretch with my games and would need +12 hours to play my turn.

Thanks - Numahr

[jimbojones1971]

Hi,

I am a bit stretch with my games and would need +12 hours to play my turn.

Thanks - Numahr

OK, done :-)

[jimbojones1971]

Guys, apologies for the delay, I am struggling to get my turn in so I've extended the timer by 12 hours.

[jimbojones1971]

24 hour delay for Numahr, who is quite likely in the process of flying across the globe even as we speak.

[jimbojones1971]

(I am a muppet, I postponed the wrong turn - should all be good now :doh:)

[jimbojones1971]

Added a slight delay while i try to find time to slink away when no-one is looking and finish my turn ....

[Numahr]

Guys, I need +24h delay to properly play my turn. And actually not only this turn, but kind of permanently, this is going too fast for me...
Thanks for understanding

[Numahr]

In reply to the admin message: I support roll-back, but I'm fine with continuing if any player prefers to do so.
I haven't watched my turn yet (but I don't expect anything good from this stale anyway...)

[GFSnl]

I dunno.

Both options are unpleasant.

[Numahr]

OK, I have received a message that there is only 12 hours left. I will have to open the turn file to play my turn as I don't want to become a serial-staler in psite of me.

But pls, consider a +24 hours delay, the pace is really fast for me.

[jimbojones1971]

It seems that we are all ready to concede before the inexorable might of Caelum!

I will just confirm that is the case, then send out a message of congrats to the mighty GFSnl and shut down the game.

[Numahr]

Well done GFSnl! I have only witnessed the end of this game, as a sub. I quickly realized that you would be my main enemy, after a few skirmishes with Oceania. But this was not enough...

Congratulations!

[GFSnl]

Whoohoo...

First win in MP.

Well I can disclose now that I have about 150 clams plus arcane nexus which means about 200 extra pearl a turn on top of my regular gem income. And I'm producing 3 fully kitted Tartarians each turn.

I did get lucky by starting in the corner. Having a good NAP with Marignon on one side and squabbling neighbors on the other.
This way I could expand my empire by annexing the war torn neighbors in the east without any losses.
After turtling and clamming a bit a massive joined strike with Maringnon on Shinuyama sealed their fate.
By that time T'ien Ch'i and Oceania had weakend themselves with perpetual war.
I must say the way T'ien Ch'i made several comebacks was amazing. After this my Gem and Clam income was just to large although Oceania with his Arcane Nexus and forge of the Ancient remained a serious threat.
I tried to dispell AN twice with to few gems after which I decided to save up and just cast it myself.

Well, I really enjoyed playing with you all and I hope to see you in following games.

Greetz,

--- Hocus Pocus ---

[Numahr]

I must say the way T'ien Ch'i made several comebacks was amazing.

Well, when looking at several games, unpredictable but useless come backs or stubborn but desperate defenses kind of become my trade mark... ;)

I just have to be more successful BEFORE to get to a desperate situation!

OK here being a sub it was more a kind of formal exercise anyway, like "let's do the best out of it".

See you over there GFSnl and other game-mates!

[jimbojones1971]

Well, when looking at several games, unpredictable but useless come backs or stubborn but desperate defenses kind of become my trade mark... ;)
You certainly have proven remarkably hard to kill, I have to say!