The true story of Grebeg
Learn the true story of Grebeg:
At last, Grebeg, the beautiful, vegetarian lady from Atlantia, stood shivering in front of the giant ice doors of Caelum. She had an urgent message from the careing beloved Godfather to the Lord of Caelum. Bloodthirsty monsters were seen in the ocean, heading to Caelum! The wise and old Godfather, who was called "Granddaddy Seaflowers" couldn't help but send his only daughter to warn the foreign people. He always said: Strangers are just friends you haven't met.
It was a dangerous journey and only her love and her joyous soul kept her alive, as Atlantis was without money, Granddaddy Seaflowers had nothing more to give to his daughter than his trust and love. (All money earned by the Godfather is donated to benevolent causes.)
She knocked at the icy doors and was lead to the Lord of Caelum. "Whaddas you buisness 'ear?" the Seraph barked "cant ya see we planning attack on the beasts o' Pangea? *@#°!$ !!" "My dear lord of Caelum" the maiden answered "Please I have urgent news of my Father, the good Godfather of Atlantis! Monsters are on their way to Caelum! We could help you fight them, but we need 300 gold for the care of the wounded, widows and orphans, because there will surely be injured or even dead Atlantians in the battle." "Mwuah wuah wuah!" the Seraph lauged "Only dead fish smell good. We luv teh smell of rotting fishes as much as of rotting Tien Chi's who we will fight after extinction of animalz of Pangea." "Oh no, my lord," the maiden said with widening eyes, "not the cute and lovely animals in Pangea and not the friendly, hardworking Tien Chi's!" "Oh yes, we love the meat and need the fur of the Pangean beasts to manufacture toiletpaper and furcoats against the cold. And to manufacture these, we need Tien Chi slaves. Mwuah hua hua. Otherwise we couldn't let open our fridges, that's where the cold comes from. Mwuah hua hua." "Oh no, think about the CO2-emissions and the energy-spoilage!" Grebeg shouted with tears in her eyes, "I begin to think that you are not a nice man." "How dare you!!" the Seraph shouted "for that insolence my evil army and I will destroy your temples, pillage your provinces and litter the coastlines with plastic-things from six-packs so all seals, dolphins and other cute animals will suffocate!" After being sexually harrassed by the Seraph, Grebeg was kicked out of the doors and left to herself. Silently crying, she began the long way home, while the evil army of Caelum began to drink all the beer they have robbed so far to gather the plastic-things and to get brave enough to attack the defensless province.
Poor Grebeg, please make her laugh again and donate 1000 gold to Granddaddy Seaflowers, Atlantis.
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