we LOVE it when a prisoner incriminates himself 
You are right there. I did some summer service in the magistrates court years and years ago. This nutter of a man was in the dock for aggravated assault (about 4 nervous policemen standing around him and me in my nikes) and the beak tells nutter he is guilty and he is going down. Nutter says he is repentant and then asks for 182 other offences of aggagravated assault and grievous boldily harm to be taken into account. El Beako looks a bit shocked (I am in starter postions aimed at the exit), and asks nutter is they were all assault charges. Nutter says "He finks so but he wasn't sure cos some of them couldn't move afterwards"
Laugh? I did when I made it out of the building
Ah yes, what a friend of mine likes to call "lawnmower beer"; beer to be drunk ice-cold after being forced to work outside on a hot, sweaty day. The taste of the beer doesn't matter; in fact, it's better to use cheap, nasty beer so as not to waste the good stuff when you're more concerned with cold & numbing rather than taste & enjoyment.
LOL, I do like that term, I do think you are being a little unfair to Fosters, although I would qualify it by saying I normally would only drink the export
Yeah, the GF is a looker, and a jealous one at that (fine by me - I can be the jealous type as well 
). As for policies, in the initial post on this thread, you quoted from the Book of Cyril
I did quote but interfering with a FBW will get you tied over a barrel and rodgered senseless by someone called roger. Not demoted even in a figurative sense.. more like feeling like the outside of a sausage roll in the figurative sense
I think Crown Royal can be a regular in the bar.. as long as it is ice cold from the Eskey