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-   -   Ye New Galactic Bar & Grill & Phong's Head Cantina - After Hours (http://forum.shrapnelgames.com/showthread.php?t=6576)

dogscoff April 15th, 2003 09:46 AM

Re: Ye New Galactic Bar & Grill & Phong\'s Head Cantina - After Hours
*Crazy dogscoff, still crazy, appears out of nowhere, his arrival heralded by a tiny crack of thunder and a wisp of hallucinagenic smoke.

He immediately scuttles over to sit beside GT, giggling gleefully and jumping up and down from a knuckle-walking position. One of his antlers is broken, but he doesn't seem to mind. He is an agent of chaos now, and all that matters to him is causing random trickery and unexpectedness. His amulet is gone but instead, crudely tattooed on his forehead is the rune of Loki, god of mischief.

Crazy-Loki-dogscoff expresses his delight at GT's return and the inevitable resultant mayhem the only way he knows how: By gibbering excitedly and doing another of his arcane little dances, this one involving him falling on his side and pedalling his legs so that he spins around in circles, leaving a pool of rabid foam beneath his head.

Gradually, the air becomes thick and sparkly, and the nature of Crazy-Loki-dogscoff's welcome-back present for GT becomes apparent: One by one little fairies begin to appear. Each one is a sexy female just a few inches high, with gossamer wings, lacy lingerie and a teeny tiny little cattle prod. At least two of them look just like Holly Valance. Soon there are dozens of the little critters, zipping about in the air leaving multicoloured trails of pixie-dust, wiggling their little booties provocatively and delivering painful but strangely erotic zaps of electricity to anyone who gets too close.

Loki-Dogscoff claps and hoots with approval, then jumps onto the bar and from there to top of the tent-pole, clinging on upside-down to watch the proceedings.

[ April 15, 2003, 08:49: Message edited by: dogscoff ]

dogscoff April 15th, 2003 02:05 PM

Re: Ye New Galactic Bar & Grill & Phong\'s Head Cantina - After Hours
With a mad twitch of his tangled five-foot beard and a few uttered profanities, crazy-loki-dogscoff once more evokes the ancient powers of Chaos and Mischief flowing through him.

Suddenly, the actions carried out upon crazy-Loki-dogscoff by the corrective enema team are felt not only the gibbering recipient but by everytone else in the Cantina including Taz (who goes into a destructive whirlwind frenzy) Rags (who kinda likes it), 'Tigga, (who roars with discomfort and immediately dismembers the corrective therapists) and all the multitude of fairies, who giggle and then redouble their zapping activities.

crazy-Loki-dogscoff, who has been running around filthy and naked the Last few days anyway, remains in the straitjacket for the time-being since he is far too insane to care one way or another.

Gryphin April 15th, 2003 05:03 PM

Re: Ye New Galactic Bar & Grill & Phong\'s Head Cantina - After Hours
:: From His Obitting Battle Crusier ::
:: Watches the arival of GT, Relived that the Great Cat has returned, ::
:: Transmission, Growtigga, how long are you back for? When do you plan to shut this cantina down? ::
mac, are you ready to open the shopping emporium?

Growltigger April 15th, 2003 07:48 PM

Re: Ye New Galactic Bar & Grill & Phong\'s Head Cantina - After Hours
An antenna rises fromthe back of GT's atomic-biological-chemical proof super-warrior suit.

"Start Transmission - Hello Guffin stop not able to close down the cantina stop that is in the name of growltigga stop and I am now growltigger stop an important difference stop and everytime I blow the cantina up stop certain muppets carry on fighting in it stop get the feeling that it never will stop anyhow, must go stop an FBW has found the hatch to my underpants stop she is doing interesting things stop I hope she doesn't stop End Transmission"

Growltigga takes out his trusty cricket bat and brings it down with force on Dogscoff-Loki's head
"Cheeky blighter, needs a slappin' and no mistake"

PS I am around till close of play (UK time) Thursdsay, and then off again for 2 weeks

[ April 15, 2003, 18:50: Message edited by: growltigger ]

Growltigger April 16th, 2003 01:12 AM

Re: Ye New Galactic Bar & Grill & Phong\'s Head Cantina - After Hours
Growltigga, immune to the electric shocks of the nubile fairies in his super-warrior suit (and kind of wishing he wasn't) signals Taz to open the reserve "Public Order Control" instrumentation panel behind the bar....

Taz duly does so and pushes the button marked "Corrective Therapy". Several transporter beams flicker into life in the cantina and hey ho, suddenly the lead singer of Rammstein (dressed up as a neuro surgeon), 6 PVC clad heavily muscled dwarfs and 6 nurses (bearing an uncanny resemblance to Salma Hayek) in rather revealing outfits (and clutching large syringes) appear..

The dwarfs grab the rabid Dogscoff and strip him, before strapping him into a straightjacket....

The nurses then shave and smear his miniscule lovepump with conductive jelly as the mad doctor attaches electrodes....

"Clear" is shouted, and 10,000 volts are repeatedly put through El Scoffo, much to the amusemant of the cantina patrons....

The doctor then turns over Dogscoff and reaches for his 6 foot enema syringe!!

Atrocities April 16th, 2003 04:17 AM

Re: Ye New Galactic Bar & Grill & Phong\'s Head Cantina - After Hours
Poor Quality Video. Sand Lake

The high quality one is over 2 gigs. http://forum.shrapnelgames.com/images/icons/icon7.gif

[ April 16, 2003, 03:18: Message edited by: Atrocities ]

Puke April 16th, 2003 05:10 AM

Re: Ye New Galactic Bar & Grill & Phong\'s Head Cantina - After Hours
good god man, i cant explain it either. I killed scoff once for you, even after he was already dead. But he has come back to life, died and come back again since then, and there isnt much to be done about it, unless you fancy the possiblity of the next incarnation more than the one we have got.

As far as the cantina goes, I think its currently an etherial incarnation of its former self, in a pavillion tent somwhere on the plains of the abyss. I wanted to found a new one, but these yutzes kept posting.

mac5732 April 16th, 2003 06:30 AM

Re: Ye New Galactic Bar & Grill & Phong\'s Head Cantina - After Hours
mac strolls into the temp cantina and sees that the old hairy feline is back, he smiles to himself as he listens to GT telling everyone that he has been away on vacation and that he will be leaving again soon.......If they only new the real truth... http://forum.shrapnelgames.com/images/icons/icon10.gif

If you want to see what really happened to Growltigga and where he more then likely ended up spending his days because of his well, until now, hidden dark side.......clik on the below link
and see GT caught in the act... http://forum.shrapnelgames.com/images/icons/icon10.gif http://forum.shrapnelgames.com/images/icons/shock.gif


[ April 16, 2003, 05:47: Message edited by: mac5732 ]

Growltigger April 16th, 2003 10:05 AM

Re: Ye New Galactic Bar & Grill & Phong\'s Head Cantina - After Hours
Yep, that is me, small cute orange and furry and not looking like a muscular Version of William Hague or Phil Mitchell in anyway whatsoever.....

We now have a quandary. Given my moving firms and my ident change resultant from that, I cannot close down the cantina and I haverun out of "Mean Mother" Missiles to blow it up with....

What do we do?

I am off again from tomorrow night (that is vacation, I have been away for the Last month on work) so you guys have a week to work out what we do..

and frankly, given the amount of poo in this place, I am not sure I want to hang around for long...

How about Dogscoff/Loki or whatever the hell he is setting up a new institution, I leave it to him

Atrocities April 16th, 2003 10:24 AM

Re: Ye New Galactic Bar & Grill & Phong\'s Head Cantina - After Hours
MAC you didn't shoot that Kitten did you? I mean it was surrendering!

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