[dogscoff]

'Tigga, never fear, I have an answer to your problem.

Recently developped in a lab in Belgium, i have managed to procure the prototype of the world's first pair of fully-featured prosthetic testicles. These highly advanced, computerised robo-nads are fully controllable and adjustable, and carry their own on-board, self-contained power supply (uranium not included). They fulfil all the functions of a normal pair of Sandras, but with a much higher fuel efficiency. They have a pager and vibrate function, they pick up FM radio and play mp3s, are fully waterproof and will work in a temperature range of -110 degrees C to more than 2000 degrees C.

The only thing is, they are a little heavy (3kg with a full uranium pile) and will tend to clang loudly together when you walk, but considering all the added features built in I'd say that was a minor inconvenience.