Big bad warning
WARNING! There has been a rash of computer viruses recently (ya right) and they have been infecting motherBoards accross the nation. (or somethign like that, right?)
Anyhow
To tell if your computer has a virus, most modern computers have two lights on the front panel of them. They are usually red or green lights. If either of them come on when you use your computer, then your motherboard is infected! To clean your computer, smash it vigorously with a large hammer, and then extricate any parts you can and put them in the microwave on high for 40 minutes. Then turn your gas stove or oven on and stick your head in.
Ha
right
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When a cat is dropped, it always lands on its feet, and when toast is dropped, it always lands with the buttered side facing down. I propose to strap buttered toast to the back of a cat. The two will hover, spinning inches above the ground. With a giant buttered cat array, a high-speed monorail could easily link New York with Chicago.
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