OT: Harddisk defragmantation

[Ruatha]

http://www.datadocktorn.nu/us_frag1.php

Do it yourself, and while there, check how to change the graphic card aswell! http://forum.shrapnelgames.com/images/icons/icon10.gif

[Captain Kwok]

At first I thought it was for real, and then I kept going - and I was like what hell? Is he putting the Harddisk on a speaker assembly??? http://forum.shrapnelgames.com/images/icons/shock.gif

[mottlee]

Originally posted by Ruatha:
http://www.datadocktorn.nu/us_frag1.php

Do it yourself, and while there, check how to change the graphic card aswell! http://forum.shrapnelgames.com/images/icons/icon10.gif <font size="2" face="sans-serif, arial, verdana">LOL HEY!!! it quit workin'!!!! http://forum.shrapnelgames.com/images/icons/icon9.gif

[Captain Kwok]

I've been reading on - and can't stop laughing!

[Grandpa Kim]

And to think, a hands-on kind of guy like me, has been fooling around with Speed disk! ROFLMAO

[Fyron]

I think you should add a disclaimer stating that the site is a joke, and you should never do what it tells you to, so that Mac doesn't think it is a good idea and go do that to his computer! http://forum.shrapnelgames.com/images/icons/icon12.gif http://forum.shrapnelgames.com/images/icons/icon6.gif

[rextorres]

this was a joke!!?

[Fyron]

Yes, but only people that are knowledgeable about computer hardware and computers in general would be able to tell it was a joke.

[Kamog]

LOL! That's funny! http://forum.shrapnelgames.com/images/icons/icon7.gif That's a nice way to kill your hard drive... http://forum.shrapnelgames.com/images/icons/icon10.gif

[Wardad]

WOW, I can't wait to build my own data machine.

[Kamog]

I read the other step-by-step instructions on changing the graphic card, building a desktop, and cleaning the keyboard, etc. A very helpful site. http://forum.shrapnelgames.com/images/icons/icon7.gif

Now I know how to do all my hardware ugrades and maintenance on my computer! Luckily, I know where to get most of the tools and components I need, but it seems that whatever I want to do with my PC, I also need some Swedish steel wool with soap, "Svinto" brand... I'll look for it next time I go to Wal-Mart... I hope they sell Svinto in Canada.

I wonder if Docktor Nårton teaches anything else, like do-it-yourself heart surgery.... just use your handy data-grinder to cut, make sure you wear your safety surgical gloves, use medical tongs to pry things out that can be discarded, scrub organs with Svinto steel wool, put everything back and seal with tape... there, wasn't too hard, was it?

[Captain Kwok]

My favourite image on the site was the keyboard tied to the drainage pipe at the car wash. http://forum.shrapnelgames.com/images/icons/tongue.gif

[Kamog]

Check out the discussion forums on that site! Super funny! http://forum.shrapnelgames.com/images/icons/icon10.gif People giving each other totally silly and dangerous computer advice! Didn't laugh so much in a long while. Thanks for posting that link, Ruatha. http://forum.shrapnelgames.com/images/icons/icon7.gif

[narf poit chez BOOM]

didn't find it that funny.

[geoschmo]

Originally posted by Imperator Fyron:
Yes, but only people that are knowledgeable about computer hardware and computers in general would be able to tell it was a joke. <font size="2" face="sans-serif, arial, verdana">That's true, if they are complete and utter morons!

Anyone that can't figure out that this site is a joke probably doesn't have the computer skills to find the power button on their pc, much less find this website. http://forum.shrapnelgames.com/images/icons/icon10.gif

But he does have a disclaimer. At the beggining of the post he says if you don't know how to get your data machine open you shouldn't be doing the hardware defrag. Seems to me that's a perfectly adequate disclaimer right their. http://forum.shrapnelgames.com/images/icons/icon12.gif

[Fyron]

Ahem... Mac? http://forum.shrapnelgames.com/images/icons/icon12.gif There are millions of people out there that know how to turn on their computer and use it, but have less than 0 knowledge about the internal workings of it. And not all of them are morons either.

[ February 09, 2004, 18:33: Message edited by: Imperator Fyron ]

[Ruatha]

Originally posted by narf poit chez BOOM:
didn't find it that funny. <font size="2" face="sans-serif, arial, verdana">Then you should try it at three a clock in the morning, then it's much more fun!
That's when I found it!

[Rollo]

Originally posted by Imperator Fyron:
Ahem... Mac? http://forum.shrapnelgames.com/images/icons/icon12.gif There are millions of people out there that know how to turn on their computer and use it, but have less than 0 knowledge about the internal workings of it. And not all of them are morons either. <font size="2" face="sans-serif, arial, verdana">but Fyron, this procedure is not meant for them. That is why Docktor Nårton says: "...if you don't know how to do that, You'll ought to stop reading right now, since your knowledge about datamachines is way to low.
Don't be surprised, it won't look like the disc on your turntable."

anyway, I defraggled my motherdisc and it worked great http://forum.shrapnelgames.com/images/icons/icon7.gif . Good thing I still had a box of Svinto in my kitchen from my Last trip to Malmö (Svinto is a Swedish brand of Steel wool added with soap, ask for at your nearest convenience store).

Since I had the motherdisc already open, I also decided to make a new partition. I used a few data chisels (a hacksaw also works good) to cut all the discs in two.

Be careful when you do this, that you don't mix up which parts belong together.

It is a bit more difficult than the standard defraggle process to get all the parts together after you devide the discs. But a little bit of peanut butter can be of great help. That also serves as a lubricant for later and makes your motherdisc run faster and more quiet.

Anyway... after I am done my motherdisc runs very fast and booting the computer takes almost no time. And now I have not only a C: drive, but also an Ö: drive http://forum.shrapnelgames.com/images/icons/icon7.gif .

[Litcube]

Originally posted by Imperator Fyron:
"knowledgeable about computer hardware and computers in general would be able to tell it was a joke"

Dude took steel wool to his computer.

[Fyron]

You are greatly overestimating the vast majority of people...

[Litcube]

lol

[Kamog]

Just for fun, I think I'll start using the Docktor Nårton terminology when I talk with my coworkers... http://forum.shrapnelgames.com/images/icons/icon10.gif

PC = data machine
hard drive = motherdisc
defragment = defraggle
internet = interweb

Edit:
Also, some cool Swedish sayings! http://forum.shrapnelgames.com/images/icons/icon7.gif

"Sometimes there are as little time as it is money, just as far as the noose goes"
"You'll be able to fix to most malignant bugs who throw pokes in your wheels"
"I fly whom walks on it's toes across a river, doesn't make a summer"
"At the same time, to flies on one blow"

I have no idea what they mean, but they sound kind of neat.

Maybe I can say these and impress the people who work at Ikea when I visit that store next time. I noticed some pretty attractive-looking girls working there Last time I went there. Come to think of it, perhaps I can pick up some Svinto steel wool at Ikea... (In my city, they have Swedish furniture stores called Ikea, they sell good-quality, fairly-priced furniture, and they also sell some various Swedish goods as well. http://forum.shrapnelgames.com/images/icons/icon7.gif )

[ February 10, 2004, 06:27: Message edited by: Kamog ]

[narf poit chez BOOM]

don't forget, Norton Antivirus - Nårton Antsavirus

seems like a logical extension to me.

[Ruatha]

Originally posted by Kamog:
Just for fun, I think I'll start using the Docktor Nårton terminology when I talk with my coworkers... http://forum.shrapnelgames.com/images/icons/icon10.gif

PC = data machine
hard drive = motherdisc
defragment = defraggle
internet = interweb

Edit:
Also, some cool Swedish sayings! http://forum.shrapnelgames.com/images/icons/icon7.gif

"Sometimes there are as little time as it is money, just as far as the noose goes"
"You'll be able to fix to most malignant bugs who throw pokes in your wheels"
"I fly whom walks on it's toes across a river, doesn't make a summer"
"At the same time, to flies on one blow"

I have no idea what they mean, but they sound kind of neat.

Maybe I can say these and impress the people who work at Ikea when I visit that store next time. I noticed some pretty attractive-looking girls working there Last time I went there. Come to think of it, perhaps I can pick up some Svinto steel wool at Ikea... (In my city, they have Swedish furniture stores called Ikea, they sell good-quality, fairly-priced furniture, and they also sell some various Swedish goods as well. http://forum.shrapnelgames.com/images/icons/icon7.gif ) <font size="2" face="sans-serif, arial, verdana">One more saying from the same site:

your hands grows safely in your pockets


And I must say I liked the answer to how you format your internet to upgrade it to Win Xp.

Also from the site, some techical terms:

Internet Ignorer 6.0.
Plug'n Pray.


And one of my favorite quotes to someone replying he doesn't speak english:
That's ok, you can talk any language you want. I speak both of them.

And the overclocking advice is beautiful, just remember to place the clock over your computer!
But I feel for the person not finding the "Any " key on his keyboard, 3 weeks and it still says "Press any key"!
And the solution to My disk is FAT
being Don't accept cookies is also useful.

And I still haven't seen any good solution to this problem:

Im currently trying to upgrade my Gforce 2 graphics accelerator card to Gforce 3, but althoug i have dropped it from approx. 3 meters a couple op times, the impact with the concrete floor dosent seem to give it more than a 2 G impact.
I am considering if it has to be a 3 kilometer drop, and if so how will i get it out of the window of an Boeing 747-400 without the airline personel notising it.
(No wonder the Gforce 3 are expensive the ticket itself is almost the price of a new card..)

[oogs]

defragment = defraggle


this guy must hate fraggle rock or something... isn't "defraggle" sort of like saying "getting rid of fraggle[ rock]" ?

[narf poit chez BOOM]

some of those have double meanings. http://forum.shrapnelgames.com/images/icons/icon7.gif

[Suicide Junkie]

You know, those sayings sound sorta like they were babelfished to swedish (or somehting) and back...