OT - Had to Share Some "Forum Humor"

[Slynky]

Picked this up at another forum I frequent. There, more than here, it's uncannily too true:

"How many forum members does it take to change a lightbulb"

1 to change the light bulb and to post that the light bulb has been changed
14 to share similar experiences of changing light bulbs and how the light bulb could have been changed differently
7 to caution about the dangers of changing light bulbs
1 to move it to the Lighting section
2 to argue then move it to the Electricals section
7 to point out spelling/grammar errors in posts about changing light bulbs
5 to flame the spell checkers
3 to correct spelling/grammar flames
6 to argue over whether it's "lightbulb" or "light bulb" ... another 6 to condemn those 6 as stupid
2 industry professionals to inform the group that the proper term is "lamp"
15 know-it-alls who claim they were in the industry, and that "light bulb" is perfectly correct
19 to post that this forum is not about light bulbs and to please take this discussion to a lightbulb forum
11 to defend the posting to this forum saying that we all use light bulbs and therefore the posts are relevant to this forum
36 to debate which method of changing light bulbs is superior, where to buy the best light bulbs, what brand of light bulbs work best for this technique and what brands are faulty
7 to post URL's where one can see examples of different light bulbs
4 to post that the URL's were posted incorrectly and then post the corrected URL's
3 to post about links they found from the URL's that are relevant to this group which makes light bulbs relevant to this group
13 to link all posts to date, quote them in their entirety including all headers and signatures, and add "Me too"
5 to post to the group that they will no longer post because they cannot handle the light bulb controversy
4 to say "didn't we go through this already a short time ago?"
13 to say "do a Google search on light bulbs before posting questions about light bulbs"
1 forum lurker to respond to the original post 6 months from now and start it all over again

[Timstone]

Hahaha... shall we start this tempting conversation or shall we let it be?

[Renegade 13]

So yesterday I was changing this lightbulb...

[Timstone]

Oh, do continue! http://forum.shrapnelgames.com/images/smilies/biggrin.gif

[Flame on]
You're not qualified to change a lightbulb!! Lightbulbs should always be changed by the appropriate personel. Clearly recognisable by the luminous clothing and the black text on their back, stating: LIGHTBULB CREW, TOO HOT TO HANDLE.
[/Flame off]

[TurinTurambar]

Renegade, was it a 40 or a 60 watt bulb? Cuz you know, a compact florescent that's only 18 watts is just as bright as a 75 watt standard bulb. So I hope you were being environmentally responsible and changing the old bulb to a compact florescent...

[douglas]

How exactly did you change the light blub, Renegade? Personally, I like the "the world revolves around me" technique. http://forum.shrapnelgames.com/images/smilies/wink.gif

[Alneyan]

Do I look like someone who cares about light bulbs? Now trainspotting... that's another thing altogether.

[Timstone]

Am I the only one who questions Renegade's ability to change a lightbulb?!
Come on, everybody knows a lightbulb must always be changed by authorized personel.

Personally I would use women with mini miniskirts and a ladder... http://forum.shrapnelgames.com/images/smilies/cool.gif

Edit: Women qualified to change a lightbulb of course.

[douglas]

Timstone said:
Come on, everybody knows a lightbulb must always be changed by authorized personel.


You misspelled "personnel". You needed another 'n'.

Your friendly neighborhood spelling/grammar nazi reporting for duty http://forum.shrapnelgames.com/images/smilies/biggrin.gif

Slynky said:7 to point out spelling/grammar errors in posts about changing light bulbs

[geoschmo]

Timstone said:
Personally I would use women with mini miniskirts and a ladder... http://forum.shrapnelgames.com/images/smilies/cool.gif

Edit: Women qualified to change a lightbulb of course.

Isn't wearing a miniskirt and standing on a ladder all the qualifications she would need? http://forum.shrapnelgames.com/images/smilies/tongue.gif

[douglas]

geoschmo said:
Isn't wearing a miniskirt and standing on a ladder all the qualifications she would need? http://forum.shrapnelgames.com/images/smilies/tongue.gif


That needs to be plural http://forum.shrapnelgames.com/images/smilies/tongue.gif.

[Alneyan]

Timstone: you are expected to spell verbs the -ise way, hence authorise and not that authorize abomination.

This message was brought to you by the British Spelling Union for Lazy People (not sure if a verb can be spelt with -ize? Just put -ise all the time, and all shall be fine!).

And Douglas, you misspelled light bulb "lightblub". Don't you have any shame? http://forum.shrapnelgames.com/images/smilies/wink.gif

[douglas]

Alneyan said:And Douglas, you misspelled light bulb "lightblub". Don't you have any shame? http://forum.shrapnelgames.com/images/smilies/wink.gif


How dare you question my spelling abilities?! I always spell everything perfectly! I don't even have to check the post in question to know that you're making something up! Troll! I'm petitioning a moderator to get you banned! http://forum.shrapnelgames.com/images/smilies/wink.gif

Slynky said:
5 to flame the spell checkers

[El_Phil]

Candles are the way forward!

[Timstone]

Candles are indeed the way forward... to the heart of women. Hehe... And don't forget potato lambs.

All those grammar errors and I didn't even notice, I love you spelling/grammar nazi's. You guys are great!

Hmm... Giving compliments wasn't in the list now was it? This makes the list even longer. Hehe.

Edit:
Forgot the lightbulb.

[Slynky]

*slaps forehead and wanders off muttering, "What have I DONE?"*

[Timstone]

Indeed what have you done.
You should be punished! In public of course. All we need is an executioner. Any takers?

Edit:
Crap, forgot the lightbulb again.

[douglas]

Timstone said:
Crap, forgot the lightbulb again.


That's "light bulb". Get it right.

[El_Phil]

Nope that isn't a job for an executioner. This is much more a job for an angry mob of righteous citizenry with flaming torches. Or possibly carrying light bulbs on very long extension leads.

[Timstone]

El_Phil:
Yeah, I know. I used the word for lack of a better term.

Douglas:
Sorry mate. I'll try to use light bulb in the future.
Thanks friendly neighborhood spelling/grammar nazi! http://forum.shrapnelgames.com/images/smilies/biggrin.gif

Edit:
Oh no, again I forgot the light bulb. There I spelled it right.

[narf poit chez BOOM]

You forgot...

A random amount of forum loonies/wackos/weirdos to post entirely off-topic posts.

So...

HEY LOOK AT THIS GREAT GAME YOU SHOULD PLAY THIS GREAT GAME ITS GREATT ITS GOT TANKS AND DRAGOND! RTANKSAND DRAGON! ITS ATWWQ,TANKZANNDRAGON.GOM! I PLAYYD ITFOR A DAYANDI GOT A LEVL @@# SNIPERNINJABEAR!!! LOLOLOL!!!

(Ok, that's enough. My brain is melting. http://forum.shrapnelgames.com/images/smilies/laugh.gif)

[Parasite]

This really has been posted here before. http://forum.shrapnelgames.com/images/smilies/happy.gif

Check out post #148620 - 02/24/04 03:24 PM by Loser on the "Jokes and Riddles Centre".

[TurinTurambar]

No really. Compact florescents...

[Fyron]

Slynky said:
*slaps forehead and wanders off muttering, "What have I DONE?"*

Hmm... I sense another Ruatha.

Seriously guys, super-bright LEDs are the way to go! Those fluorescent bulbs use way too much energy.

[narf poit chez BOOM]

(Musn't forget the unfounded rumours)

Doood!, LEDs are like, harmfull to the environment and stuff. I heard they use arsenic to make them!

(That would be so funny if it were true http://forum.shrapnelgames.com/images/smilies/laugh.gif )

[kerensky]

What's a light bulb?

[douglas]

kerensky said:
What's a light bulb?


http://www.tribalwar.com/forumshttp://forum.shrapnelgames.com/images/smilies/google.gif
Try google before posting dumb questions here.

[Alneyan]

douglas said:

kerensky said:
What's a light bulb?


http://www.tribalwar.com/forumshttp://forum.shrapnelgames.com/images/smilies/google.gif
Try google before posting dumb questions here.



And you were the one who couldn't spell "light bulb" a few hours ago; now you ask people to look up light bulb, something you failed to do yourself? Ah, the irony!

http://forum.shrapnelgames.com/images/smilies/wink.gif

I guess it falls under the "5 users flaming the spell checkers".

[RCCCL]

Alneyan said:
Now trainspotting... that's another thing altogether.



Hey! That sounds like a Monty Pythons' Flying Circus quote.

I do not recall anything at all about light bulbs in any episode. You need to stay on topic!!!! http://forum.shrapnelgames.com/images/smilies/mad.gif

[narf poit chez BOOM]

I really have to apologize. The tension is just getting to be to much. I just can't stand the stress...

.../me proceeds to whack everybody in this thread with a hammer. http://forum.shrapnelgames.com/images/smilies/laugh.gif

[Slynky]

Somehow, I KNEW the hammer would have to come out http://forum.shrapnelgames.com/images/smilies/eek.gif http://forum.shrapnelgames.com/images/smilies/wink.gif

[Renegade 13]

Timstone, I AM a qualified lightbulb changing person. I have all the authorization certificates and diplomas from my 9 years in lightbulb changing school. It really is an art, every single lightbulb brand and wattage has a different style to inserting it into the socket. Some require gentle twisting, others need a violent wrenching motion, others even need a pipe wrench to get those nasty things in!

Turin, my lightbulb, it was a 100 watt, fully polluting, light pollution creating monster of an illuminator!

And Douglas, well I actually like the rotating wrist method. It really is the only way to go http://forum.shrapnelgames.com/images/smilies/cool.gif

All you grammar Nazi's need to...yes...change more lightbulbs! It is incredibly relaxing. First you smash them, then you get to change them! Relaxation and tension relief all in one http://forum.shrapnelgames.com/images/smilies/wink.gif

[RCCCL]

*retaliates with a "squishy noodle slap" to Narf*

[Timstone]

Renegade:
Hahaha... LOL!!!
Okay, I hereby grand you full authority to change light bulbs around the world. You can now change light bulbs in evry country you might want to visit. A good suggestion is to visit Holland and come over to my home and change all my light bulbs. I haven't got many light bulbs (I live under a rock), but I can assure you I have some very exotic viariants.
P.S. Do you have the trademark T-Shirt for an official "Light Bulb Changing Master"?

Edit:
This time I didn't forgot the light bulbs. I even spelled 'light bulb' right every time. Wohoo, progress!

[douglas]

Timstone said:
<snip> in evry country <snip>

I even spelled 'light bulb' right every time. Wohoo, progress!


You shouldn't confine your correct spelling to just those two words, you know.

[Renegade 13]

Actually, there is a T-Shirt for a lightbulb changing master such as myself. It says "Burned Out?" on the front, then on the back says, "Call your local lightbulb changing master, 1-250-999-5839"

Oh, and I will be sure to make a stop by Holland, just to change your burned out bulbs! http://forum.shrapnelgames.com/images/smilies/happy.gif

[bearclaw]

I tried to read this topic but my brain got stuck on the mini-skirt/ladder thing and everything after that has been a blur...

[RCCCL]

What kind of light bulb would you use a pipe wrench for http://forum.shrapnelgames.com/images/smilies/confused.gif?

[kerensky]

Meaning of LIGHT BULB
Pronunciation: lIt bulb

WordNet Dictionary

Definition: [n] electric lamp consisting of a glass bulb containing a wire filament (usually tungsten) that emits light when heated

Meaning of LIGHTBULB
Pronunciation: l'Itb`ulb

WordNet Dictionary

Definition: [n] electric lamp consisting of a glass bulb containing a wire filament (usually tungsten) that emits light when heated

I also have a nifty image!!!

http://static.howstuffworks.com/gif/light-bulb-label.jpg

Click here (http://www.ehow.com/how_370_change-lightbulb.html) to see how to change a light bulb.

[narf poit chez BOOM]

...What do I do with the potato once it's attached to the lightbulb?

[Renegade 13]

RCCCL said:
What kind of light bulb would you use a pipe wrench for http://forum.shrapnelgames.com/images/smilies/confused.gif?


Well...its a massive lightbulb and it really really doesn't like going in its socket. I'm not lying, nope! http://forum.shrapnelgames.com/images/smilies/cool.gif

[RCCCL]

A massive lightbulb, eh........

If the lightbulb is to high to reach, there is a lightbulb pole you can use to change it.

[El_Phil]

I have an excellent bulb of light changing device. I call him Roger.

[Timstone]

bearclaw said:
I tried to read this topic but my brain got stuck on the mini-skirt/ladder thing and everything after that has been a blur...



Hahahaha!!! LOL!!! http://forum.shrapnelgames.com/images/smilies/stupid.gif
*Imagines a very nice woman wearing a mini-miniskirt and standing....*
Damn, I failed imagining it, must have been too dark for me to imagine (burned out light bulbs http://forum.shrapnelgames.com/images/smilies/cool.gif). Maybe I have a good pic lying around for something like that (not the bulbs of course).

[Kamog]

That would be nice. I'll save the burnt-out light bulb that she removes, and keep it. Every few days I'll change the bulb back to the burnt-out one so that she can fix it again.