I am just Evil

[Atrocities]

As an evil emperor I once bought a case of Slime Mold Whisky, loved it so much that I erradicated the race that made it so that I could claim that I had the only bottles left to exsist in the universe.

As an evil Emperor I once was so board that I ordered my fleet to shoot at each other.

As an evil Emperor I once boiled the Brocoli embassador and ate him for dinner.

As an evil Emperor I once invaded a planet after they accepted a treaty of peace.

[NullAshton]

As an evil Emperor, I added to this topic.

As an evil Emperor, I demanded that everyone must play MOO3

As an evil Emperor I LAUGH AT THEIR PUNY ATTEMPTS TO MAKE PEACE! MUUWAAHAAHAA!

[Atrocities]

As an evil Emperor I outlawed Space Empires IV and V.

As an evil Emperor I conqured entire world and spaced them all just to see if the myth that no one can hear you scream in space was true.

[NullAshton]

As an evil Emperor I forced everyone to listen to Britney Spears.

As an evil Emperor I locked everyone into a room with TerranC.

[El_Phil]

As an evil Emperor I promoted Narf to Minister for Mental Health

As an evil Emperor I forced the closure of the Cantina.

[Markavian]

As an evil emperor I disolcated Narf's knee and forced him to try and win the 400m finals in the inter galatic trade sports cup.

[narf poit chez BOOM]

That would be difficult at two inches high with a migraine.

[Ed Kolis]

A 260 pound mouse which is only 2 inches high? What are you made of, lead? http://forum.shrapnelgames.com/images/smilies/tongue.gif

[narf poit chez BOOM]

No...I was refering to Markavians' new height...

[TerranC]

NullAshton said:
As an evil Emperor I locked everyone into a room with TerranC.



As a good emperor I gave free mugs of root beer and all dressed potato chips to everyone who were locked in with me.

Oops, wrong theme.

[narf poit chez BOOM]

As a good emporer, I gave all my subjects the day off...

...All one of me.

[Starhawk]

As an evil Emperor I glassed an entire world just because I broke my favorite coffee mug and needed a replacement.

As an Evil Emperor I dropped Planetary Napalm on an entire world just to cook some marshmellows......I then destroyed another world because I forgot the damn marshmellow!

As an evil emperor I destroyed a sun just to see if my sunglasses really would "Block all UV light"

As an evil Emperor I killed every man on the planet just so that I could finally look at those girls and go "Really not even if I were the last man on Earth?"

[Renegade 13]

As an evil emperor I...wait a minute...I'm not an evil emperor!

[Strategia_In_Ultima]

As an evil Emperor I imprisoned Aaron and forced him to play MOO3.....

As an evil Emperor I ordered Vivendi to buy Malfador.....

As an evil Emperor I ordered Vivendi to buy Shrapnel.....

[Karibu]

As an evil Emperor I force you to constantly ask a new patch for MOO3 from Atari, while knowing it will never come.

As an evil Emperor I ban tomato from pizzas

As an evil Emperor I force everybody to put peanut butter on pizzas

As an evil Emperor I force everybody to eat them.... while applying patches for MOO3. Muahhahhaaaa!!!!!

[NullAshton]

As an evil Emperor I sold the rights to Space Empires to Microsoft.

[narf poit chez BOOM]

Mmmm...Peanut butter pizza...

[El_Phil]

Good old Narf, totally lacking in taste. Evil thrice damned peanut butter flavoured pizza. It's morally wrong in so many ways.

[Strategia_In_Ultima]

As an evil Emperor I would set a bot on the forums to reset Narf's post count to 1 every time he posts, at which point the bot will post "Hello and welcome to the forums." until Narf is driven sane.

As an evil Emperor I would force Phil to live out the rest of his life in Holland. http://forum.shrapnelgames.com/images/smilies/wink.gif

As an evil Emperor I like AIs. They're the easiest way to build up a sizable empire without lifting a finger, save for the occasional troop transport! http://forum.shrapnelgames.com/images/smilies/wink.gif

[El_Phil]

Frankly Holland could be alot worse so living there wouldn't be that bad. Just have to teach my local bars that a big frothing foaming head on a beer is a very bad thing. There are worse places, Belgium springs to mind as being far worse. http://forum.shrapnelgames.com/images/smilies/laugh.gif

[Intimidator]

Okay !!!!!!!

What's the problem with Holland !!??
We Dutch are criticizing Americans, not the other way around !! http://forum.shrapnelgames.com/images/smilies/happy.gif

[Atrocities]

Holland runs the risk of going under the Sea each and every day now. So we should love our Holland friends and pray that they never again face a big flood. http://forum.shrapnelgames.com/images/smilies/tongue.gif

[Kamog]

As evil Emperor, I ban the use of any operating system besides Windows ME.

[Atrocities]

As an Evil Emperor I would post information that states that SEIV has, and I quote: "Amazingly realistic political features" in order to hype the game. PROOF (http://strategyfirst.com/en/games/redir/?iGameID=134) Read the Features and be afraid.

[Strategia_In_Ultima]

EVERYTHING'S THE PROBLEM WITH FRIGGIN HOLLAND!!!!! EVERYTHING'S THE PROBLEM WITH FRIGGIN AMERICA!!!!!

I'm Dutch and not proud of it!

*****

As an evil Emperor I once conquered the EEE just to see what would happen if you were to put one on a BBQ.

[El_Phil]

Strategia: Spreading cheer and love to one and all.

I may have been a flukey bugger, but Win ME was a sparkly OS for me with no real problems (beyond the usual hilarious bugs Bill puts in for giggles.)

Holland is too flat and needs to be taught how to pour a proper pint. Decent cheese and tea wouldn't go amiss either. But still it isn't Belgium, or France for that matter http://forum.shrapnelgames.com/images/smilies/laugh.gif, and it has it's good points.

[Intimidator]

Strategia_In_Ultima said:
EVERYTHING'S THE PROBLEM WITH FRIGGIN HOLLAND!!!!! EVERYTHING'S THE PROBLEM WITH FRIGGIN AMERICA!!!!!

I'm Dutch and not proud of it!

*****

As an evil Emperor I once conquered the EEE just to see what would happen if you were to put one on a BBQ.




I didn't say I was proud of being Dutch........... especialy NOT the last 3 years..........

Inti,

[NullAshton]

Conquering the EEE isn't evil, find something better.

[Atrocities]

As an Evil Emperor I had an entire species wiped out because they did not breath the same atmosphere as my people.

As an Evil Emperor I once burned the entire face of my homeworld just to make room for my new palace.

As an Evil Emperor the first thing I did when accending to the thrown was to kill everyone who helped me get their, their families, friends, pets, and any one who might have known them.

As an Evil Emperor I believe firmly that tourcher is the best method for extracting no information, but screams.

[Atrocities]

As an Evil Emperor I once shot a close friend in the face just to see his reaction.

As an Evil Emperor I once killed a man to watch him die, got distracted and missed it.

As an Evil Emperor I had all the fat, ugly, and medically challegned women exterminated. Afterwards I had to import women from a colony world as there were non left on my Homeworld.

[Strategia_In_Ultima]

As an evil Emperor Phil now has exactly 666 posts. It's true! http://forum.shrapnelgames.com/images/smilies/wink.gif

Yup, you're right, conquering the EEE isn't evil, as everybody seems to do that, and this forum isn't filled only with evil emperors right? oh wait, lemme check that again.....

[El_Phil]

Tempting as it was to never post again, (And I'm sure many people here would agree that would be a good thing) I couldn't really stop. And where better to break through 666 than on a thread about just being evil?

Anyway back on topic. The EEE need to be put in their place, and that place is as low cost replacements for used up batteries. Think about it, who wouldn't want an EEE powered portable MP3 player?

It's even suitably evil: Conquering an entire alien race just to save you a few quid on buying rechargeable batteries! http://forum.shrapnelgames.com/images/smilies/laugh.gif

[NullAshton]

The Eee deserve to be conquered.

[Strategia_In_Ultima]

El_Phil said:
It's even suitably evil: Conquering an entire alien race just to save you a few quid on buying rechargeable batteries! http://forum.shrapnelgames.com/images/smilies/laugh.gif



Even a few P would justify it, wouldn't it? http://forum.shrapnelgames.com/images/smilies/wink.gif

It really seems like everybody is always ganging up on the EEE. I mean, I have had a rather pleasant alliance with them once. I was told that my home star was going to explode in a year, but I had no colonies outside of my home star system and AIs were all around me hogging the best planets. So I put all my population in Transports and sold my home system to the EEE..... for a Huge Oxy Gas Giant (I was Oxy), a moon colony, AND several ships including at least three Carriers with advanced technology.

You see? The EEE aren't that bad at all! Especially not when they're the FRIGGIN FIRST PLACE PLAYER! lol, my people were having a massive celebration to honor my amazing skills of diplomacy, selling a doomed system to the EEE in exchange for a better world than my friggin' HW.....

[Kamog]

Conquered an entire race to save a few squids!
...??? ...oh, quid, as in pounds! http://forum.shrapnelgames.com/images/smilies/wink.gif