Bar Trek: The Next Generation. Episode 4: Sore Leave

[Growltigger]

Captain Jean Luc Le Grand Chat, actually terrified for once at what Commander Dogscoff's inept fumblings may do, pulls out his trusty phaser, sets it to "max sting" and shoots Commander Dogscoff in the buttocks...

"Stop that you idiot" shouts the burly heroic captain "we want to get back to our proper dimension, not fumble round other dimensions which could we worse than this one.. given the appalling gingerness and minginess of the crew of this ship, imagine what our useless counterparts are getting up on the Phong's Head! by god, they could be running away from Deadstar ponces, abusing each other and banning alcohol on the ship! get a grip man, we have to return but if it makes you feel better, I shall see what can be done about enforcing a "thin layer of strawberry jam" only uniform on board (for the girls only I stress), Taz, you are the only sensible one on this away team, double check the transporter and let us beam ourselves bacvk to where we belong"