Bar Trek: The Next Generation. Episode 4: Sore Leave

[Kamog]

Several girls, grinning evilly, walk right up to Kamog, holding their bLasters pointed directly at Kamog's head.

"OK, OK, I'll drop my weapon!" Kamog drops his phaser rifle to the floor. "But tell me one thing..."
"What?" asks one of the girls.
"Do you like... ONIONS?"

Suddenly, a large hatch flips opens up in the ceiling, releasing a gigantic pile of the vegetable. Kamog dives into the fountain, and the girls look up just in time to see a huge truckload of onions fall on their heads. Within seconds, the room is filled to shoulder-height with the vegetables. There are arms and some nice-looking legs randomly sticking up into the air, flailing, as the girls struggle from under the pile.

Kamog is bruised, as a particularly large onion bonks him in the head just as he comes up for a breath of air. In the confusion, however, Kamog manages to grab one of the girls, pull her out from beneath the vegetables, and drag her to the door on the other side of the room. Pulling her by the arm, Kamog runs down the hall and turns left - and arrives at the Medical Lab.

Running into the lab, Kamog sees Chief Engineer Erax. He also notices in the room a chair, and hanging above it is a metal helmet-looking device with many wires and antennae sticking out. There's a sign on the helmet that says "Teacher".

Kamog draws his samurai sword and points it at the girl. "All right. Tell me how this equipment works."

Girl: "You sit down and put on that helmet, and you can learn all sorts of things instantly... "
* She picks up some data crystal-looking things.*
"I'll be your operator... Now, we're supposed to start with these operational programs, but that's major boring stuff. Let's do something more fun. How about combat training... go ahead, put on the helmet."

Kamog: "Jujitsu? I don't need to learn jujitsu. I'm not putting on that weird helmet. Just tell me how you removed Mr. S'Katchoo's brain, and how we can put it back."