Boiling the Ocean (Started, needs alternate?)

[DrPraetorious]

The vile star spawn of R'lyeh - traitorous vermin of the depths - have crassly assaulted our glorious lands.

We cannot deny that we are much weakened by our struggles with the Empire of T'ien Ch'i.

But they arrive too late! Knife Bright Insight, true Lord of the Waters, has returned to us! He will scatter them like dust - all that they have striven for, they have sought in vain.

[seej]

Long centuries have the nobles of Helheim called wise kings weak who would guard the Mouth of Hel. Restless and with greedy eyes they have left their post and let unfortunate products of necrotic incest escape the depths. Helheimers, as you could not keep safe the stewardship appointed to you, we shall do it for you. We have imprisoned you, Knife Bright Insight, in Helheim. Ugly pretender, springing malformed from a cesspool, you think yourself a Lord of Waters? As surely as the stars descend to ocean depths, we shall drive you back down the Mouth of Hel and send down after you a sword to spoil whatever dam gave you issue.