MP: I Need More Power! - yet another MA newbie game - Finished (Ulm won by agreement)

[Mightypeon]

You are watching: Ulm News, Fair and Heavy

Fishworm is back!
The Peoples Republic of Ulm has gotten a major recruitment coup as its Tartarian recruitment office acquired the services of no other than Fishworm himself! We now switch over to comrade Field Marshal Zhukov, who has taken a break from bashing Lizards and decerebralising political opponents and is now conducting an interview for Ulm News!

Field Marshal Zhukov: "Greetings Fish Worm, how do you like Ulms most incredible and totally unbiased employment opportunities for Tartarians?"

Fishworm:"I am not Fishworm! No, I am Fishnanny! No, I am Fishworm! No! No, I am Fishworm!

Field Marshall Zhukov:"Did Man or Tien Chi hit your head a lot`?"

Fishworm:"Yes! No! Which head! Both Heads!"

Field Marshall Georgy Zhukov:"While your lower part looks quite Fishwormlike, you appear to have picked up hands, and a humanoid torso and head. How did this happen?

Fishworm: Fishnanny picked up Fishworm Half in Tartarus! No, Fishwormhalf picked up Fishnanny in Tartarus! Fu Fu Fu Fusion!

Field Marshall Zhukov: "And what about your new found magic abilities? From my best knowledge, neither Fishworm nor Fishnanny was very skilled in Fire magic..."

Fishworm:"Fishwormhalf Smart was! Hehe, more Smarter Fishwormhalf indeed it was, other half got back to Fishworm palace and was turned into Sashimi by big 4 armed guy! But more smarter Fishwormhalf stayed in Tartarus and put a Dynamo on Spottygoose! Fishwormhalf got more Fire magic everytime Spottygoose used Tartarian Elevator! Muahahahhaha!

You were watching
Ulm News
Fair and Heavy

[Lung Drago]

I have even more interesting news!
Just yesterday early in the morning, I marched from the Palace, headed to the marketplace, intending to shop for some shiny new shoes fitting an Emperor. Naturally, I embarked on this voyage this soon so that no random chick could buy them out right in front of my nose.
But, just as I stepped down the last stair of the 555 long Palace staircase, I fell! Suddenly, a biga*s hole in the earth happened over night! I swear on my name I was falling for like an hour! Then I finally hit the bottom of the well and my head and life were over.
"What a mess!", I thought to myself, "Someone is going to pay for this." Then I realized I could think, so that must have meant I was alive at some degree. So, I opened my eyes and I got BLINDED! So many yellow shinies! I landed in a luxurious bed of yellow gems. No, I landed in a city of yellow gems! Right in my backyard, can you believe that?
Oh, down there was some lady too. Earthmother, she called herself? Not really talkative, reminds me of my adviser Barathrus. But in the end it turns out it was Barathrus who introduced me to this rocky lady and she simply invited me over for a cup of tea. Well, she wanted to drink some weird brown stuff at first, but we unsurprisingly settled on a tea once she had her first tasting.
So, I got myself a new friend! I intend to visit her once a month at very least. She said she likes me and will prepare yellow shinies gift for me each time. She is really nice! Except I have a hole in front of my front door now and you cannot really reach the other side unless you fly or teleport. I have comissioned building of a cable-railway over the chasm.

Doesn't change the fact I still need new shoes, though.