Forum Chat Bar & Grill

[Renegade 13]

Renegade stumbles back as the foam coats him thoroughly from head to toe. Feeling the temperature abruptly begin to fall, he sighs in relief, loving the cool respite from the tropical temperatures of the B&G. After all, Renegade grew up in the frigid north of Canada, the flame retardent foam feels like a nice cool spring day of -20.

Slowly moving back to his seat in the shadowy corner, Renegade closes his eye in absolute bliss and enjoys the coolness.

[Black_Knyght]

Black Knyght begins to regain his composure and rise after extricating himself from GrowlTiger. Having lost sight of Growltiger, he is unaware of his actions until a breach alert blares it's warning.

Suddenly alert to the actions of GrowlTiger and his efforts to penetrate the aft portion of his armor. Black Knyght attempts to rise. A sudden impact jars him, followed by an odd squealing sound.

A split-second too late, the realization of what the sound was hits Black Knyght. GrowlTiger, in his frenzy to get at Black Knyght, drove the Red-Hot Poker Hand Cannon straight into the fuel tank used for the flight jets !!! The squeal was not from Black Knyght, but from the escaping pressurized fuel contained within.

An enormous explosion occurs, firing Black Knyght forward, upward, and outward through the roof of the Bar & Grill like a spiraling Roman Candle.

GrowlTiger, still holding his Red-Hot Poker Hand Cannon, stands in the ground zero aftermath of his explosive mistake. Deafened by the blast and scorched a charcoal black from head to toe, smoke slowly curling up from sizzled fur and singed whiskers, he blinks twice in stunned silence at what just happened.....

[Saxon]

Growltigga silent? That is unlikey to be a long lasting condition...

[mac5732]

The old wize one, notices one of the old regulars who has been away from quite some time. He motions a group of the FBWs over and whispers into their ears. They immiediatly surround the Saxon while another pours coins into the jukebox. They then begin to gyrate and grind around, up against, and into poor old Saxon... The Old one waves and raises his glass in toast to another old regular who found his way back home once more......., (after which, he pushes the button on his secret bag which in turn sends electric shocks into Renegades Buttocks )

[Growltiger]

Black Kngyt fails to notice that the Curry enhanced poker is actually equipped with rectal heat seekers and directional jets....

Given all the shenigans surrounding his rear end, BK's fudge tunnel is actually glowing incandescently, and he squeals (reference to the stuck pig again) as an aerial poker impales his tender parts and does its best to singe of the leavings of poor bottomly hygiene which BK has around his nether ends........

Skewered like a moth, BK crashes to the ground, unfortunatelly falling rear first just so that the poker gets an additional bit of push.....

The squealing can even be heard in Texas (where they think that the Texifornian has pulled a bird again)....

Growltigga brushes off the charcoal from his fur, and heads over to the old Moose Kisser and the Stinky One for a well earned pint of Spitfire (no Fokker comes close) (ouch and apologies to any German posters for that tag line)

[Black_Knyght]

As Black Knyght soars up into the sky from the explosive reaction to GrowlPussyCats reckless and OBSESSIVE anal fixation ( gotta wonder about that...), his sensors notice the enhanced Poker Cannon tracking his flight. He automatically fires of an interceptor missile, which streaks so fast towards it target it's passage through the air causes a sqealing sound to be heard. The interceptor missile strikes and obliterates the hostile in a brief but brutal explosion.

Black Knyght begins to recover control of his unexpected flight with his auxillery flight systems, and puts out the flames with his fire-suppression system. As he descends the squeal of rapidly cooling metal eminates from his robotic chassis until he touches down rather more abruptly than desired. System lights across the board blink in protest. Black Knyght decides to pause here for a bit to allowed the automated repair systems to do their job before heading back to the Bar & Grill....

[dogscoff]

For those forriners querying terms like "vindaloo", "madras" and "Phaal":
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Curry#British_cuisine

[Cipher7071]

Along with the sensory pleasures of solid form, such as enjoying one's ale, occasionally come certain unpleasantries, such as being soiled by fire retardant and rocket exhaust. But I have learned to accept these occurrances philosophically.

Once again becoming incorporal, Cipher allows the bits of foam and soot to drift lightly to the floor. There is also a small splash of undigested ale....sigh.

[Growltiger]

Errrr exactly where is Black Knyght now?

and the "anal fixation" comes from what the red hot poker hand cannon is actually meant to do. It is not as much fun if it is for assaulting someone's nostrils....

For those still wondering about this, the basis for the hand cannon cames from an episode of Blackadder II, where Edmond Blackadder had fallen foul of The Baby Eating Bishop of Bath & Wells who was going to singe the anti-hero's personal parts with a red hot poker for non-payment of a debt (until Blackadder managed to get some leverage for arranging a comprising portrait of said Bishop with Percy).

The curry enhancements are courtesy of Viz magazine, and the pleasures of enjoying a "Curry Hell" at the Rupali Curry Restaurant, The Bigg Market, Newcastle Upon Tyne, England.

The application of the hand cannon for acts of grotesque violence against Bar & Grill patrons however is all my own.

[mac5732]

Black Knight, the red hot poker cannon has been around since the cantina was first incorporated, along with all kinds of Sea creatures, lew worshipers and many others. However, GT must like you, as he has not let loose old T-Rex and the killer mongooses on you yet. Its been a long time since old T-rex and the gooses have gone on a hunt... when you hear the horn and the trumpets, start running

In the meanwhile, the old one, sits back, orders his usual from the FBWs, and watches to see if dogscoffs sea creatures show up, if an old fashion hunt will transpire or if the Black Knight or other new members attempt the inner sanctum with the lew worshippers lie in wait (shudder)