Revoltingly OT: Size of your colon

narf poit chez BOOM · #1 November 3rd, 2005, 03:27 PM

Males and poop jokes?

AgentZero · #2 November 4th, 2005, 05:03 AM

OK, you wanna know where it went totally over the top? Like I mentioned above, the 'health expert' guest claimed his kids were dropping logs the size and thickness of HIS arm. Not his kid's arm, HIS. And he figured out there was something wrong with him because he thought his should be proportionatly the same size. PROPORTIONATLY?! That would mean a 'healthy' human adult would be having a bowel movement that was BIGGER THAN THEIR LEG! Well, he was right about one thing, there is something very, very wrong with him, but I think it's a bit north of his digestive tract.

dogscoff · #3 November 4th, 2005, 07:18 AM

*dogscoff produces a turd the size of a small urban light-rail commuter train.

*dogscoff airs it as an infomercial.

AgentZero · #4 November 14th, 2005, 04:05 AM

LOL, that's nasty!

But hey, on the topic of crap, anyone catch the second part of Category 7: End of the World? Yeah, crap. I mean, in the end, they disperse the storm by shutting off all the power in DC which drops the temperature by a few degrees which apparently is enough to disperse a storm in seconds?! Maybe I'm spoilt in Ireland since we don't import the crap, but I was thinking with shows like CSI etc, we were finally getting away from that whole junk science thing. I mean, at least put an effort into coming up with a plausible ending to the story? Seriously, correct me if I'm wrong, but once you get a big nasty storm on your front yard, the only thing left is to ride it out and hope for the best. After all, the electricity supply is usually the first thing to go, and I've been through a lot of nasty storms and none of them have magically disappeared within a few seconds of the lights going out.

Once again, made-for-TV movies have screwed me out of another two hours I want back.

Bleh....

Fyron · #5 November 14th, 2005, 01:55 PM

But weather controlling machines are so cool! Who cares if we don't know what we are talking about, we are Hollywood writers! Don't ever go work for Hollywood AZ, it will turn your writing into a log the size of my forearm.

Phoenix-D · #6 November 14th, 2005, 04:02 PM

CSI is hardly decent science, you know. Actually most shows on TV aren't; any time they go anywhere near my specialty (biology) it makes me cringe.

Which casts very strong doubts on the rest of it, especially given that I can pick out ridiclous stuff elsewhere, as well.

Atrocities · #7 November 17th, 2005, 12:59 AM

Quote:

Imperator Fyron said:
But weather controlling machines are so cool! Who cares if we don't know what we are talking about, we are Hollywood writers! Don't ever go work for Hollywood AZ, it will turn your writing into a log the size of my forearm.

Or larger, his upper leg!

Renegade 13 · #8 November 16th, 2005, 03:37 PM

"The last shall become first, and the first shall become last"

Not sure of the exact phrasing, but that's the general idea.

Also, Lot's "comforters" weren't exactly nice guys when he was diseased, with boils covering his body, etc. Not nice guys at all, if I remember correctly. Was it his wife who said "curse god and die" ?? Or one of his "friends"? In either case, not something I'd say to a spouse, or a friend!!

Ragnarok · #9 November 16th, 2005, 03:57 PM

Just to clearify, I believe you guys may be confusing this Lot with Job. Job is the one who lost his children, his livestock, was cursed with leoprasy and his wife said to curse God and die.
(Another note: the reason that she said that is because she and Job both thought God was causing the calamities. Little did they know that it was actually Satan taking everything away from him. This account was the ultimate example of integrity.)
He did end up gaining double what he had before. Oh, and Narf, it was the same wife who came back to him.
Now Lot on the other hand lived in the city of Sodom just before it was destroyed.
While leaving his wife looked back and was turned into a pillar of salt.

AgentZero: You are right when speaking of Lot losing all he had and impregnating his daughters. But they were the ones to initiate it.
Lot later moved from Zoar and began dwelling in a cave in a mountainous region. The prospective sons-in-law of Lot evidently died in Sodom, so Lot�s two daughters were without mates. They caused their father unwittingly to have sexual relations with them while he was under the influence of wine. This they did to preserve offspring from their father. As a result, each daughter had a son, from whom the Moabites and the Ammonites descended.

Anyways, this thread should get back on topic...

narf poit chez BOOM · #10 November 16th, 2005, 05:28 PM

Right, thanks.