For Multiplayer, most games have "usual settings"

[Lord_Bob]

for a multiplayer game.

What is the normal difficulty setting for research?

What is the normal indie strength? That has a major effect on recruitable independent mages.

What is the site frequency for that?

What is the most common mod? Is the standard patch used more than mods?

[Velusion]

I can only tell you for non-blitz games as I don't blitz:

Research is usually standard

indie strength is usually normal

Site Frequency is usually pretty high (45-50), though personally I prefer the standard value for the age.

Standard is used more than the mods. The two most common mods you'll probably find are the Worthy Hero's mod and QM's Conceptual Balance mod.